A Christmas Gift

chapter five

Well this is the penultamet chapter

Chapter Five

Geraldine sighed, please God not now, she thought. The lead up to Christmas was her busiest time of the year. People seemed to remember Christianity for a couple of weeks; well at least until the sales began and until then they expect a play, a carol service, Christingle and a nativity. Not to mention the services over Christmas all of which were attended by a much larger than normal congregation. No, this was not the time to begin to feel unwell; she just did not have the time to be sick. She sighed again, but she couldn't deny that she seemed to be going down with something. Her muscles ached she was tired and nauseated. Harry had been sick with a bug last week, she thought she'd avoided catching it but it looked like she'd been wrong.

"Morning Vicar V." Alice practically bounced into the vestry.

Geraldine grimaced and counted to ten, Alice's brand of relentless cheerful optimism was rather more than she could cope with today.

"Good morning Alice, You're early today." 

Alice plonked herself down on the chair next to Geraldine; even though she was now the mother of several children she remained as inelegant, gamine and gauche as ever.

"I couldn't sleep. I think I was too buzzed after the show. I was alright wasn't I?" Alice asked worried.

"You were fine and I'm sure nobody noticed at all that you called Tiny Tim, Tiny Jim all night."

Alice's lip wobbled.

"What about when I drank the health of David Horton instead of Ebenezer Scrooge?"

"No I think that went down rather well with the audience." Geraldine put her arm around her friend. "And at least you didn't fall of your stilts like Owen did."

"True, but then I wasn't wearing stilts was I. So I couldn't fall of them could I?"

"You're as sharp as tack today Alice."

"Talking of people on stilts, it was on the news that the man in pleather is going to be a dwarf."

"Sorry what have stilts got to do with Richard Armitage being a dwarf?"

"I don't know who Richard Armitage is, but gorgeous Guy is going to be a dwarf. I think he is limiting himself."

"He is limiting himself?" Geraldine asked even though she was dreading the answer.

"Well yes. I mean a Dwarf's what about 4ft tall right? The only way that I can think a bloke over 6ft tall can become 4ft is to have both his legs amputated."

"Amputate his legs?"

"Yes and that will limit his career choices. It seems a bit rash to me, just so he can work in New Zealand with that Oscar winning director."

Geraldine sighed, torn between putting a stop to this nonsense and prolonging it just a while longer.

"Alice he won't amputate his legs."

"He won't?"

"No he will just have a little of the cake from Wonderland like Alice, and shrink. When he is finished he will have a sip of the bottle that says drink me and he will grow again."

"Really?"

"Well it could be the other way round drink to shrink and cake to get in large. Well it is for me anyway."

"I suppose that's what Jack Black did for Gulliver's travels."

"No Alice it won't really be like Wonderland it will be done with CGI?"