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liked by kimnamjoon, chelsealovex, and 45,739 others
cicihud So I've been MIA for six months and here's an update. I'm pregnant, diagnosed with high blood pressure, and I'm an alkaline vegan now! I still dance whenever I can but only around my new apartment. Thank you guys for worrying about me but my family have been great supporting me. IM A MOMMY NOW OMG.
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As expected right after I posted my update on my life, many people were texting me. Namjoon and Jia were one of the first ones asking me if I was good and if all was okay or how I found out. How I found out?
Right after I flew home from Seoul, I was unnecessarily tired. I mean I got tired just from reading a text message. My family threw a Welcome Home party for me and I fell asleep after an hour into the party, at the kitchen table. I also found it extremely hard to digest certain foods. My mom went with me to the doctor after two weeks when my symptoms became worse because she was extremely worried until to find out I was pregnant. Immediately, I already knew Hoseok was the father even when we were extremely careful most of the time, the last time, after the emotional drama, we didn't use protection.
I was upset for a good two months because it was like life smacked the fuck out of me. I had too many plans to start actually becoming a choreographer, owning my own dance studio, and traveling. I blamed myself a lot and I just felt the need to isolate from social media. Hoseok didn't know about my pregnancy. We actually had great communication until I found out because I just felt bad. I made a mistake and it just felt impossible.
Hoseok's a Korean citizen and I'm an American citizen. To make matters worse, Hoseok was a Korean celebrity—with extreme popularity, not only in Korea but worldwide. I had family here to help me and that didn't mind helping with my baby so I didn't feel the need to tell him anything. I was just worried about my health and my baby's health because ultimately that's all that matters. I didn't need to be named in tabloids, I've had enough of that.
