The Summer '09 (boy x boy)

(Prolouge)

My hand traced over the nonexistent lines that I wish was there. The sharp blade glistened slightly under the faint light emitting from my black tinted windows. Tracing among the imaginary lines on my pale, slender wrist, it's razor sharp edges, gently caressing my skin. Slowly, I took an experimental lunge; making nothing but a small dent -- Not enough to make an open cut, but rather, enough to get my heart pumping.

Then, as if on cue, my nerves took over, and the blade was no longer in my hand; Nowhere in my sight. I quickly hugged my knees as anxiety took in. Was I that weak? Didn't I want to relieve myself of the pain? Even if it's just for a moment? His image once again re-appeared into my mind. The small smile he held, the way his skin made contact with mine as if I was as intricate as a snowflake.

My mind drew to a blank as I tried remembering his appearance, his complexity. He seemed nothing more than a dream to me now; a mere figment of my own world. In the back of my head, I knew that if I tried remembering, If I called out his name, there would be no answer, a void. It would take another century to completely wipe him away from my mind once again, because it was that difficult.

Salty tears that I thought dried up, started prickling my eyes once more, as my mind went back to those days. The days where he would wake me up with a gentle whisper, the days where I felt his warmth beneath my grasp. The days where he still existed; When his heart was still beating, those days where Louis Tomlinson still existed.