tw: su!cide, light description of dead body, depression, slight stockholm syndrome
~~~September 1st, 1975~~~
"Sirius!" Sirius turned from where he and James were standing on platform 9 3/4. Remus was running towards him with his arms stretched out, James kicked his knee to get Sirius to acknowledge Remus, who had a large grin apread across his face. Remus wrapped his arms around Sirius and squeezed him tight, being able to sense his sadness and over all deprssion from the years they had spent together. Sirius half smiled, he couldn't bring himself to give a full smile, he was glad that he would never have live with his family again but he missed them, he missed all of the fighting, he missed the yelling, he didn't know why. He knew it was extremely harmful and painful to him, but it calmed him. Not in the sense that it made him content, but more so that he had grown used to it, the fighting and abuse.
Reg had died a few weeks after Sirius left, he had overdosed. Sirius still woke up from night terrors of the horrible event of having found his brothers body, cold and lifeless, lying on the hard ground with pills around him. His parents had blamed Sirius for their child's death, he partly believed them. He told all of this to James on their last night before leaving on the train. James told him not to blame himself for his brother overdosage, it wasn't his fault. Sirius and James had talked more until James had gotten tired and eventually fell asleep, but as hard as Sirius tried he couldn't fall asleep.
Sirius decided to go down the stairs and into the living room. He knew Mr. and Mrs. Potter were asleep, they went to bed around 9:00 most days. He was thinking about his family, how his brother was dead, it was really sinking in. How his family despised him, called him a blood traitor, they only sent him letters that criticized the ways he lived, after each howler that he got, James would find him in some room in his house with a fire roaring, fueled by the hatred of Sirius' family, with puffy, red eyes, his nose running, and red blotches on his light skin.
~~~~~~FLASHBACK~~~~~~
~~~James' bedroom July 26 1975~~~
Sirius was spending the summer at the Potters' after the 'incident' a few weeks ago. Sirius was crying. James had just come down to check on him, because he had woken up from his slumber and come downstairs to get a glass of water, and seen Sirius in front of the fireplace gazing into the raging redhot flames with silent tears rolling down his face. He didn't look angry, or sad, or any emotion that James could come up with. He just looked hopeless. And it hurt James to see him like this.
A/N hope you guys enjoy this! im sick right now so ill probably add more to this story quicker, thanks for reading!
