You Hurt Me More Than You Know.....

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Klaus P.O.V

As soon as I opened my heart out to Star she walked away and I felt hurt, maybe because I thought she would have responded the same in return. The hurt was not because she didn't speak the word back to me the hurt was that I brought this on. When you give your heart away, you usually get it back in pieces fragments. And often a great deal of time passes before you realize that every piece wasn't returned to you and probably never will be. You crave nothing more than to get those small but vital fragments back; to return to the unbroken, undamaged version of yourself. But what's been broken cannot be unbroken and so all you can do is learn to live with the void of the missing pieces, to somehow find beauty in the wreckage. I had toyed with her heart for better half of two months I brought another woman into our home and bedded her in our marital bed. Yes I did all that to hurt her, because I felt that Star needed to feel the same pain as I did. My mind at the time was clouded with rage with anger and hatred I wasn't thinking straight at all. Even as I look back at every word I said to her the way I spoke so venomously... Who could blame her telling me that she couldn't? I constantly disappoint her.

I have not loved many in my thousand years and I have only been in actually been truly in love once. We hurt so much because we have lost a part of ourselves. If we have loved much we must have given much also and when everything's over, we feel as though we have lost everything. Which was what had happened here tonight as nothing else matter to me no longer. I know that I will be a father in a short time and I will give my love and devotion to my son and daughter. That no matter how much all this pained me I needed to be there for these two innocent lives that I helped bring into this world. And Star...... Well I choose not to give up on what we have I'm not one who gives up easily, I will repair what destruction I have cause to her heart, and I will show her once again the man she once loved. It is our wounds that create in us a desire to reach for miracles. The fulfilment of such miracles depends on whether we let our wounds pull us down or lift us up towards our dreams. I knew it would take as such to make this happen but I believed in us. I believe that there a chance that we can once again be united it's just time for the wounds to heal.

I went back into my room and got changed then into my bed I began to listen in on Star and I could hear her crying, hearing her sobs broken me. All I wanted was to comfort her but I knew she would reject me as she having conflict with her heart. There was no doubt that she loves me, but after everything I had done she couldn't be forgiving. I understand that no matter how many times you say you're sorry it won't wash away all the pain and hurt I caused it takes a second to make a mistake, but a lifetime to try and forget it was your fault. We never really learn from the first mistake or the second or third. It only hit us when we're given the last chance. I think that my last chance was blown but I choose not to dwell I choose to still have hope. I know I still have the chance to mend all this as my beloved wouldn't be crying her tears for me. As much as it ached me to hear her in such a way, it gave me that little hope that she cannot be with me as much as I could not be without her.

Dream.......

The citizens of the French Quarter all prepare themselves for Father Kieran's funeral service. A long line of community members and family make their way to Father Kieran's open casket to pay their respects. When I arrived I was the last one to enter by the time he reaches the casket everyone else at the service is already seated in the pews. I greeted Cami and gives her a kiss on the cheek before going to give my respects to Father Kieran. However when I opened the casket Father Kieran is gone and in his place is were two babies side by side. They both looked very much alike in ways but one had blue eyes and dark hair and the other hair was lighter with deep brown eyes. The baby with the darker hair coos at me and I couldn't help but smile.

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