Oh hell no

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Hello I'm Sargent jack savage of the 50th combined forces of the American military so to start off I'm dead but then so is everyone down here oh right we are in hell right now we'll we are in a part of hell the part were the soldiers go well those who didn't kill with malice we only get punished every Monday it's quite nice actually the devil is a nice fellow and yes before you ask we do still have our equipment witch isn't really that strange you can't kill the demons anyway so it does nothing but onto the story! ——————————————— So it's Tuesday and me and the lads are hanging out with the 5th musketeers regiment nice British fellows and we were havin a laugh but then the telly turned on and showed the most recent news of earth and everyone went silent. Then I stood up ANGRY BEYOND FUCKIN BELIEF turns out a bunch of animals had become anthropomorphic and had started killing my people with OUR tools so I stormed up to Satan's office barged in he looked up and said 'so you saw the news' I looked at him shaking in rage and demanded that me and the dead soldiers be allowed to go back to earth and stop this slaughter of our kind he looked at me intensely and said 'if I were to do that you would have to do me a massive favour' I said fine but I want every man armed with modern weapons and equipment and the knowledge to use them. He said 'deal' we shook hands and that's how I made a deal with the devil

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