One Night in New York

Chapter Twenty

For the next few hours, days, and even weeks, our lives were a blur. I felt physically present, but my mind was having difficulty processing Connie's death. Everyone seemed to be in a daze, unable to grasp the reality in front of us. When it's someone you genuinely care about, a loss is always felt deeply, and we were all feeling the loss. Everyone knew she was in a better place, where she was no longer in pain, but the place we wanted her to be was with us.

A few weeks had passed as we approached the end of our governor's stay-at-home order. Angie and Marcus chose to stay with us the entire time because they were afraid to leave and wanted to assist the family during one of their most difficult times. I scheduled another ultrasound during that time because it had been months since my last. Because Liam couldn't accompany me due to the virus, we decided to wait until I delivered to find out the gender of the baby.

Everyone tried to concentrate on the baby and the joy it would bring to an otherwise bleak time in our lives. Liam was busy ordering items for our child online, and as far as I could tell, we would not be having a baby shower. It was heartbreaking, but we knew it was for the best. We wanted everyone to be safe, so we put an end to any plans to celebrate with friends.

After a few weeks, our baby's belongings began to arrive. It was late May at the time, and the stay-at-home order would be lifted on June 13th. We used that time to make final preparations for our new arrival. It was starting to dawn on me that I would soon be a mother, and with my new little family.

The baby provided a welcome distraction for Liam, as he felt he could focus on their arrival rather than his mother's death. He didn't want to forget her but instead wanted to focus on the good things in life. How about Angie and Marcus? They had, once again, decided to stay with us at least until June 13th. But we didn't mind. We had a houseful of people we cared about. What about Alyssa? At that point, she and Andrew had become a couple. I knew it was going to happen, and I couldn't be happier for the two of them. She had been spending the majority of her time at his condo, which freed up space for us to begin assembling the nursery. Thomas appeared to have made a permanent home with us as well, but he was welcome to stay as long as he needed. I believed he could begin to heal as long as he was surrounded by those who cared the most about him.

So there we were; the stay-at-home order had finally been lifted. It was the middle of June, but it felt like it would take a while for our lovely city to return to normalcy, whatever that was. The numbers continued to rise, and we prepared for the next significant chapter in our lives. I wanted everything to be perfect and clean in preparation for the arrival of our little one.

Angie and Marcus eventually returned home, while Thomas remained in our home. It was beginning to feel empty, but that emptiness would soon be filled with sleepless nights and a crying baby. Would I mind, though? Absolutely not. As a first-time mother, I anticipated all of the challenges and rewards of motherhood. Was I insane, you ask? Maybe, but I've heard it's a different story when it's your child. You don't mind the commotion. You welcome it with open arms because it means you're with your baby, no matter what. OK, maybe I was overthinking it, or maybe that's just what I heard. 

"I feel like a whale. I can't wait for this to be over," I told Liam as we meticulously folded each onesie and stacked each diaper in its place.

Liam stood laughing at me and tried to crack a few jokes, "You say that now, but wait until you are walking around like a zombie. You'll be trying to put them back in."

"OK, babe, that's not a good visual, and I'm sure I will be just fine. I'm just so uncomfortable and look at my ankles. I mean cankles. I can barely tell the difference between my foot and my calf!" At that point, I felt as if I was retaining so much water.

I was beginning to get nervous, but Liam reassured me it was OK, "Nat, it's just weight gain, and I read that a woman retains a lot of water during pregnancy. Maybe you should get off your feet and try and elevate them for a bit. Let me take care of putting everything away."

"No, we are about to put the crib together! I've been looking forward to helping you. I'm staying, and we are working on this with each other," I insisted.

Liam just shook his head, knowing that was a battle he'd never win. I was hormonal, cranky at times, and obsessed with nesting. I couldn't sit back and let him handle everything. I desired...no, required that everything in the nursery be perfect. It had to be that way, and I wouldn't have it any other way. I was slightly obsessed. But aren't all new mothers?

The third of July was approaching. We only had a few days until my due date. We weren't doing anything special for the Fourth of July because most Fourth of July celebrations had been canceled due to Covid. We decided to grill on the back patio and enjoy the rest of our days before the baby with the people we care about. We'd only be seven people because we didn't want to be around too many folks while the virus was still present. We prepared for the next day as best we could given our current circumstances. As we did so, it gave us the perception that our lives were returning to normal.

That morning, I started getting lightheaded. I began feeling dizzy while helping to set up some decorations. My vision quickly blured, and my feet and ankles continued to swell, leaving me feeling overall ill. Liam became concerned as he saw my condition deteriorate. My head began to throb as one of the worst headaches I'd ever had hit me full force.

"OK, Nat, I'm calling your doctor. We need to get you in," Liam urgently told me.

"No, babe, I'm weak. I just need to lie down for a little bit. I will be OK."

Liam did not accept my response and immediately called my doctor. "Hello, my name is Liam Taylor. My fiancée is due in a few days and doesn't appear to be doing well. Can Dr. Kennedy be paged to call me back, please? "He explained to the nurse on the other end of the line. He told her about all of my symptoms and was told not to wait.

Dr. Kennedy was paged as Liam came rushing into the room where I lay resting, "Come on, babe, we need to go. Now," he demanded.

I sat up, head throbbing, while I tried to push Liam away. I was beginning to feel confused as he attempted to pull me off the bed. "Liam, please, let me sleep," I begged.

"No, Natalie, we have to go. Something isn't right." The sound in his voice scared me, so I agreed to get up and go to the hospital.

I had already backed an overnight bag, which Liam quickly grabbed as we made our way to our private garage. Andrew, who was standing there with Alyssa by his side, had already been notified. They wouldn't be able to accompany us, but they both wanted to make sure we got to the hospital safely.

We arrived eight minutes later. As Liam retrieved a wheelchair, Andrew parked in the drop-off zone. He wheeled me up to labor and delivery, where a room was already prepared for me. Dr. Kennedy had also been paged and was on her way in at the time. As they rolled me into my bed, I kept feeling like I was going to pass out. I lay connected to a baby monitor as it began to detect that the baby was in distress. The nurse took my blood pressure right away, which was 180/120, emphasizing the urgency of delivering our baby.

I blamed myself, you see. I had canceled all of my doctor's appointments during the onset of Covid-19, except the one where Liam couldn't go. During that visit, I had an overdue glucose test, which revealed that I had gestational diabetes, and Dr. Kennedy informed me that my blood pressure was slightly elevated. I needed to be as light on my feet as possible. Did I pay attention? No, not really, but I sure wish I had.

Dr. Kennedy arrived quickly and assessed my situation "How are we doing today, Natalie? I've heard you're suffering from severe preeclampsia." She approached me and rubbed my shoulders, and then I was out, or so I thought.