Iwaoi Angsty One Shots~requests Open~

Sorry Iwa

*Warning* self harm/suicide

Toru Oikawa, most people knew him as the popular volleyball captain who has everything. An amazing planned out life, girls, a great future ahead of him and so on. His life was perfect, according to the people around him that was but, no one saw his struggles, in his eyes he didn't understand what made him different. He was just a normal teenaged boy, sure maybe he was good looking and girls loved him but, he wasn't interested. Maybe he was pretty good at volleyball but that was because he practiced hard. To him he was just... average no not even he was so much less, people called him pretty and hot but to him he wasn't he always felt he could look better and wasn't all that perfect. The great king, he wasn't even close maybe he could be a servant at his best. He always thought he could do better and needed to. Maybe people thought he was perfect because even with all this on his shoulders he covered it up with a smile hoping no one would see through him and so far it worked.

Oikawa walked along side some classmate, they were talking nonsense and he wasn't really listening, he would hear a few sentences but overall didn't contribute. Instead he looked at the ground and quietly thought to himself.

" yo Oikawa, we're going out are you coming?"

Oikawa was brought back to reality when he heard a classmate speck his name, he looked up from the ground and started blankly at the male.

"uhhh?"

His classmate dropped his head and laughed

"I asked if you were coming with us we're going out"

"there'll probably be a lot of hot girls there"

Another guy jumped in.

"Ha like he needs to met more girls he already has all of the ones at our school"

At this point Oikawa had already looked back at the ground not wanting to listen to them.

"come on he probably got board of all the girls at our school"

Oikawa winced at the "jokes" they were making. Every time they spoke his walls crack at little more.

"so? What's it gonna be, you coming or not?"

He looked back up at the original guy you asked the question

"uhm no I'll have to pass I gotta study for exams you know"

He gave a small smile.

"what do you mean study? You're just gonna get a scholarship to play volleyball, not like you have to have top grades"

Oikawa glanced away trying to think of something to say. Truth was he wasn't planning to study.

" Well I promised a friend I would help so yeah sorry"

He waved and turned down the street to his home. Once he got to the door step he unlocked the door and went in. His parents weren't home and they wouldn't be for a while, he was alone. He had told Iwa he would be busy so he shouldn't come by. Everything was going as he hoped. He walked to his room, placed his bag down. He sighed before sitting at his desk with a single piece of paper and a pen. With trembling hands he wrote:

Dear Mom & Dad Iwa,

If your finding this you probably can't find me or maybe you have. I'm also sorry. i haven't been feeling the best for a while now so its not a surprise it came to this. I feel like This isn't like me why would i be writing this i shouldn't, i have a perfect life like everyone says but, still i feel weak. i feel like i'm not as perfect as i seem. Iwa i'm sorry, you're probably holding this note in one hand and the other covering your mouth as you try so hard not to cry or scream. You'll be hurting for a while and that hurts me too but, Please forgive me for my actions and the pain I might have caused you, after a bit this pain will leave and you won't have to deal with this or me for that matter which is probably for the better since I'm always in your way or doing something to annoy or get you angry, maybe you will even forget me or this won't faze you at all. Even if you don't care please know that i love you Iwa and without you in my life i wouldn't have made it this far, it wouldn't have been worth it. Could you tell my parents I love them and that I'm sorry for disappointing them. There's so much more to say but I'm running out of space to write, so I guess this is it. I'm sorry Iwa.

Goodbye,

Toru Oikawa.

Oikawa raised the pen from he paper and placed it beside him, a few tears had fell on to the paper forcing the ink to splotch and stain the paper an inky grey. He folded the paper neatly then got up. He made his way to bathroom. Closing the door behind him he placed the letter on the ground in front of the door sliding it under the crack so it's only visible from the outside. Oikawa sighed gabbing something off the counter. He started the water and making sure the tub was plugged not really caring about the temperature. Waiting for the bath to fill he stared into the mirror.

"you'll be fine, just relax Toru"

He reassured himself telling himself it'll be fine. Once the bath was full he got in sorta jumping a how cold it was. He looked up at the ceiling for a few minutes before laying his head back and closing his eyes, wincing at the pain as he brought the sharp cold metal up both of his arm. He let out a few whimpers as the bath water slowly started to turn a shade of red getting darker with time. He opened his eyes looking up at the ceiling, and smiled one last time. Once again closing his eyes as his breathing shallowed and finally passing.

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Iwa knocked on the door to his best friends house, he went there as a few of his classmates said Oikawa seemed off he had also thought this but passed it by as he was just in one of his moody states. Still something told him he should go. He opened the door calling out to the brunet.

"Hey Shittykawa it's me, i know you said you were busy but, I brought you some milk bread"

The house fell quiet, something was wrong. He called out once more.

"Oikawa?"

Still nothing. He mumbled to himself pulling out his phone.

"maybe he's out with someone and that's what he meant by busy"

He found Oikawa's contact pressing it, he held the phone up to his ear, it started ringing. He let it ring a bit before hearing a slight sound coming from upstairs. He didn't recognize it first but soon realized it was Okawa's stupid ring tone. At this moment he knew something was definitely wrong. He dropped his phone racing up the stairs and to the source of the sound. He arrived at Oikawa's empty room in a huff, scanning it for his friend. Nothing. He took a step back trying to figure out what was going on. Out of the corner of his eye he saw a small white item in front of the bathroom. He turned and walked up to it. Picking it up and opening with one hand, he placed his hand on the doorknob to open it but, stopped as he started reading. As soon as he stopped he quickly turned and opened the door not prepared for what he would see.

Okee this one hurt to write.