Shine a Light on Me

Chapter Five

I walk out of the room and up a long hallway. I end up in a sitting room with large tv. Something catches my eye on the coffee table. It note, it reads:

Nadia,
We've went to the London Wellness Center. We'll be detoxing there for sevendays. When we return home , We'll start out new sober lives. I know I've told you this many time but this time I have someone to support me. I promise this time, it'll stick. I have to get sober, I have a reason now. I have Jimmy. We've left your some money and the keys to the Jaguar. Take care. See you Monday night.
Love,
Mommy

I can't fucking believe her. She has a reason now? I wasn't a good enough reason. Her wrecking multiple cars, wasn't a good enough reason? My father leaving, wasn't a good enough reason? Her breaking my nose in a drunken rage, wasn't enough? I feel hot, salty tears fall down my cheeks. I don't know why I'm cry. It doesn't help anything. It won't change her. I wipe my cheeks and look for the kitchen. After a bit of wondering I find it. I pour myself a glass of juice and set off to explore the house.

It's not what I expected from Jimmy. It's decorated in a modern style, very minimalistic. I count 6 bedroom as I survey the upstairs. I look for my luggage and find it in a room with lilac walls and a large bed. I start to unpack, putting my things in the closet and setting a few photos on the desk. After everything is in its place, I sit down on the bed. I lay back and hear something crunch underneath me. Immediately get up and look under the covers, I find another note. It's folded neatly in to a square. I know it's from him. I don't want to open but I have to. I stare at for a few minutes then summon the courage to open it. It reads

Nadia,
I'm sorry for everything. I know this all must be so confusing for you. I just want you to know, I won't bother you anymore. I'm going to commit to your mother. I'm going to help her get sober and hopefully help myself in the process. I've just left you on couch, I covered you up. I hope you slept well and feel better today. My home is now your home. Help yourself to anything you'd like.
Jimmy x x

"That wasn't so bad." I say out loud, lying to myself.

I decide to go outside and have a walk around the property. It's a beautiful wooded area. There's a small stream below the house and the woods are a bustle with wild life. I sit by the stream and try to clear my head. I try to convince myself I'm not sad. That this is all for the better. As I think about it, more and more. It really is, Jimmy is a solid 20 years older then me, he's much more age appropriate for my mom. Maybe they really will help each other stay sober. I'm finally at peace with the idea of my mother and Jimmy being together. I don't feel any jealousy or conflicted feelings. I get up and walk back to the house.

I spend the next week relaxing. There's a home gym in the basement. I run on the treadmill every morning. It's the best week, I've had in quite a while. Everything goes smoothly and my minds at rest. I fill my days with exploring. I drive through the small town down the rode. The people are friendly and I buy a few things at the local market.

MONDAY

I wake up and follow my usual routine. Juice, run, then shower. The morning seems to to drag on forever. I'm excited to see my mother, it's been so long since I've seen her truly sober. In the back of my mind, I wonder if it'll stick this time. I'm anxious about seeing Jimmy. Will it be awkward? Will he avoid me? Will I avoid him? Did he tell my mother anything? I push those thoughts from my head and hope for the best.

Around noon , I go into town and get some ingredients for dinner. I'm my mother's favorite, homemade beef stew with biscuits. I spent the rest of the afternoon chopping, browning and mixing. The soup finally goes on at about to cook down at about 3. I start on the biscuits, it reminds me of baking with my grandma. I remember she's across the Atlantic Ocean. I feel a pang of homesickness. After I put the biscuits in, I call her. I tell her about the move, our new home and my latest stint in rehab.
She's skeptical of my mom's intentions and tells me if I ever need her she's just a phone call away;She'll pay for me to fly home anytime if need to.