Me Without You

Hold My Hand

Through the years both Mingyu and Jeonghan remain in silence about their feelings. Painfully seeing each other get comfortable with other people. For some time Mingyu felt an aching everytime they would attend events with other idols. Especially when Monsta X would arrive and Minhyuk would greet Jeonghan with the warmest hugs.

Mingyu watched as Minhyuk would rest his head on Jeonghan's lap. When Minhyuk would run after Jeonghan to hold hands and when he would ask for cute selfies. Jealously was too soft of a word to describe the rage that would build up inside of him. But he couldn't complain or even hold it against Jeonghan; He was a free man.

Minhyuk was completely opposite of Mingyu when it came to Jeonghan, he was bold and brave. He was unafraid to be himself and to make moves that he wanted to make, regardless of what others would think. And then there was Mingyu, always mindful of how his actions or words could affect others. Afraid of making mistakes, or taking chances. He was like a giant teddy bear, big and strong but full of fears.

On their first world tour they visited an amusement park. The film crew followed them around as they rode different rides and enjoyed a little time off from an idol life. Mingyu had no idea what the film crew had in store but would soon regret showing up.

In the distance Jeonghan can hear some managers trying to talk Mingyu out of the van. "Mingyu, you have to ride, it's good content,"He pleads relentlessly with no resolution in sight. "I can't and I won't," Mingyu crosses his arms and turns away from the manager.

He had already gotten on one ride with Minghao and refused to keep doing so.

Jeonghan interrupts, "Can I talk to him?" The manager gives up and allows Jeonghan to give it a try. "Mingyu, now listen to me, I know you're scared but I need you to know that no matter what i'm by your side," Jeonghan grabs a hold of Mingyu's hand.

"Anytime you let the darkness in, anytime you feel the anxiety taking a hold of you, anytime you feel fear, hold my hand. I don't care where you are or the reason, just come and hold my hand and I'll know. And if after holding my hand you still can't find the strength I'll fight for you and make sure you don't have to go through with anything you can't handle."

Mingyu held tighter as he pulled himself off his seat and out of the van. Still clinging on, the two made their way to the manager. "I'll do it ONLY if Jeonghan comes on with me," he negotiates.

Everything felt better next to Jeonghan; and when he felt the anxiety creeping in, he took Jeonghan soft hands into his. Not only at the amusement park but from then on. During interviews where he felt nervous, in Vlives where he might of felt uncomfortable, there was Jeonghan ready to hold his hand. And it became vice versa because Jeonghan had grown use to the warmth of Mingyu's body. They needed each other.