Going Numb

-{7}-

I'm still shaken up when I get back to the apartment later that day, and Hadley notices almost immediately. Because that's the kind of person they are. I'm eventually able to get them to leave me alone, but I'm fully aware of the glances they're not-so-subtly giving me from across the room as I read my book. I sigh, dropping the book to my lap but being careful not to lose my place.

"Hadley," I say, "I know you wanna ask, and I know it's gonna make you explode if you don't get it out, so just ask me and get it over with." They sigh, putting their phone down.

"What happened out there?" they ask. I roll my eyes. "You told me to ask, so I did! I wanna know what happened!" I pick up my bookmark and shove it in between the pages, setting my book down next to me somewhat forcefully.

"I already told you, nothing happened!"

"Bullshit!" They jump up, moving to kneel in front of me, and grab my hands. "I've known you for years, Arna! I know when you're lying to me!" They sigh. "Just tell me." I look up at them, tears pricking at the corners of my eyes.

"I fell," I say quietly. They frown. "I was chasing the deviant, and he pushed me over the edge of a building." Their eyes widen, but I shake my head. "Looking back on it, I most likely would've been fine, but then?" I sigh. "I was so...scared." They stand to sit on the couch and wrap an arm around my shoulders.

"You're still not telling me something," they say. "What are you scared to say?" I chuckle.

"You always know," I mutter. They nod, and I let out a shaky breath. "Connor." They pull away and lean forward to look over at me, brows furrowed. "He could've caught the deviant, but he came back for me." I frown, a stray tear slipping down my cheek.

"And that scares you?" I look out the window, watching the rain trail down the glass as it pours down on the busy city.

"It scares me that I don't know why." My voice drops almost to a whisper. I look up at them. "He made a point of making sure I knew he couldn't feel. That he followed his programming. But he still came back for me, even if it meant losing the deviant." I look back down at the scruffy couch. Hadley rubs my shoulders, and I chuckle. "To think, non-deviant androids are supposed to be the ones who don't understand emotions. What the fuck's wrong with me?"

"Do you actually want me to answer that? 'Cause I will."

-{}-

The next morning, I'm abruptly woken up by a Hadley jumping on top of me. I groan.

"Hadley," I say, "I told you last time that if you did this again, I was going to devour your kneecaps." I shove them off my bed as I sit up. "Would you like to lose the left one or the right one first?"

"Before you eat either of my knees," they say, "maybe you'd like to see who's here." I furrow my brows.

"Hadley, what are you-"

"I'll tell him you'll be right out!" they exclaim as they jump up and sprint out of my room. I roll my eyes and get dressed quickly, making my way out to the living room. I freeze when I see who's standing there.

"Hello, Arna," Connor says. I nod slightly.

"Yeah," I say quietly. "Hey, Connor." Hadley looks between us, a proud grin on their face. "Hadley, I swear to god, wipe that smile off your face before I tear it off with a meat grinder." I look back up at Connor. "So...what are you doing here, Connor?"

"A homicide was reported thirty-two minutes ago," he says. "I was unable to find Lieutenant Anderson at the DPD or Jimmy's Bar, and I thought you would be easier to find." I nod.