The Actress And The Beast (Post Malone story - completed)

Past

I didnt want to go to Vegas. I knew as soon as he mentioned it I recoiled into myself. Its the one place I cant relax. I have so many bad memories there. Memory's that I kept deep down and that my management had a hard time to bury. I wasnt being myself after the Vegas stop was mentioned. I knew I was being off with Austin and it wasn't his fault but even talking about Vegas gives me anxiety and I get flashbacks. I didn't want to tell Austin, I didn't want him to judge me or my past. I just wanted to forget it all and carry on with my life. Our life together. I'd got away from all of that and I was desperate not to be dragged back down.

I was in turmoil in my own head. I wanted to spend this free time with Austin and his Crew and make new, good memories here that would hopefully take the place in my brain where the bad ones where but I was paranoid that they would know I was in town and someone would come looking for me. After all the confusion with me and Austin and the whirlwind of feelings we have had I didn't think I was strong enough to deal with anymore heartache.

Whilst cocooned in the comforter in bed in Vegas I had a stern talk with myself. I was spoiling this for Austin. I couldn't take seeing the worry etched in his face. He was so caring, loving and selfless. He would have stayed in bed with me while I felt sorry for myself and not even questioned it. He was too nice and didn't want to push me to tell him what was wrong. I forced myself to get up, get showered and get ready to go out with the crew I needed to make Austin know that I wanted to be involved. He needed to feel supported and I needed to not push him away. It wasn't his fault I felt like this.i needed to show him some affection I'd pushed him away for days.

I heard him arrive back to get changed and I made sure I stayed upbeat and not seem so depressed. I wore the same dress I wore that I had on when he kissed me at his party. We walked out of the hotel and it took everything in me to not turn on my heel and retreat to the safety of my hotel suite. Where no one could get to me. Touching Austin calmed me and if it would have been appropriate I would have sat in his lap the whole time burying my head in his chest, smelling his scent. He made me feel relaxed and grounded, he was like home now. He was practically my everything.

I had avoided leaving his side all night but I was desperately in need to go to the toilet and I didn't want to be the pathetic girl who needs her boyfriend to do everything with her. I didn't want to alarm him in asking for a security guard to help me walk 20 yards. I excused myself ripping off the mic and I reluctantly headed away from my comfort blanket, Austin.

I felt someone grab me and I nearly screamed. I looked up and realised who it was and I felt defeated, I stared back into those familiar eyes. I started to cry, mixed emotions where running marathons through my body. I'd been trying to avoid this but having Tom stood infront of me now I couldn't deny my past any longer. He looked tired. That ment things where bad

It all went so quickly. He begged me to come with him. Begged that he needed me. Said if I left again so soon that something bad might happen. I knew if I looked back at Austin I wouldn't be able to walk away I allowed Tom to lead me away from the love of my life.

I got into the beaten down truck that had hardly changed from all those years ago. Tom kept talking, trying to tell me all the things I'd missed while I was gone. But I knew he was hiding something, avoiding the inevitable. I didn't want to ask either but we where getting close to our destination and I needed to know what I was walking into. We past streets I'd not thought of in years. I couldn't even remember the last time I was willingly here. Any communication with this part of my life was done through wire transfers and emails. I wasn't even the one who replied to the emails. I completely tried to shut off this part of my life. Everytime I thought of the past it just brought up complicated feelings. I had tried so hard to sort things out before I left but I just couldn't stay here any longer I had a life, a career and this town and its people were hindering me. I thought back to the people I left behind sometimes but I hadn't even wanted to live out here. I was brought up in LA. It might not be where I want to grow old now but it was home. Vegas had always felt wrong to me but maybe that's because of all the bad memory's. Or the absolute shit show that happened out here. The one my management pulled me from. The reason I had to start from scratch.

"Tom"

"Isabella" he said cautiously. He knew what was coming

"Just tell me"

"It's bad Bella, he fell off again. He knows your here. I had to lock him in the house and promise I'd find you I'm sorry"

I knew that I wasnt going to be going anywhere, I silently sobbed as I pulled my phone out and sent Austin a text. You could hear my heart break as we pulled up to the house I had nightmares of