Sadden heart

The third cruh

Ben , you know I thought he would totally be the one , he was smart sweet
And funny really funny , he always made me feel happy and if I was down Ben would just smile and ask me how I was well , I thought things were going good flirting with Ben he seemed to be flirting back with me , but when I was talking to my lady friends Patricia I told her that I like Ben like a lot and she asked me if I told him that I want to date him I said no , she said I can ask crystal to tell him ,he listens to crystal , I said okay ( hey bad mistake )
Ben called me pretty ( no guy as ever called me that before , Ben said no to going out with me he said he would never ever go out with me( that time I. Didn't but I wanted to punch him in the face ) then he just says he wants to be friends , I ignored Ben when he asked how I was going ? Right after he told me " that he would never ever go out with him . I just kind of looked at him and said fine ( I don't think he believed me ( he felt bad a little bit )
Then couple days I tried to say hi to him after anther we he totally ignored me ten couple weeks past and it was a Friday when I asked Ben of we are still friends I go up I Ben stand right by him I said yeah can I ask you something , he was like yeah what ( he moved a couple inch away from ) I said Ben are we still friends . He said no , I cried an ran to my bus got in my seat buckled up cried all the way home , I fell asleep , I was in so much pain. Well so things were going good I want to see if Ben and me can be friends again so I asked Ben yeah can we try to be friends again he said uh yeah , so I thought yes . But it was going good he teased me when I had a ELE Christmas party at work Ben saw me in a Santa hat ( I barley do that ) he said look it's miss Santa Claus I was like smiling and kind of said oh Ben . Well then after New Years he totally ignored me , I was walking toward my scrapbooking class and I said hi Ben ( I know he heared he looked at me , he didn't smile , then he just looks at my friend Kirsten and say hey like your shirt , she was like thanks . What the heck ( I don't I thought he didn't like me ) why is he acting these way , why doesn't he want to try the friendship . Why did he have to hurt me som much why does love have to be painful