Care for me (L. S.)

18

Monday the 22st of September | Jane

The sky was greyer than ash and there were tiny raindrops leaking from the clouds. Yet Jane found herself not being bothered about the weather. She hadn't been for a while.

At least staring at the clouds provided a wholesome distraction.

It didn't matter that it made her nose cold and the air humid and the roads slippery.

It brought good things too, she tried to remind herself: it eased the tension. Partly because of the washing away of the car's smells, but mainly because of the tapping noises. They make beautiful rhythms on the rooftops, which creates such a classic kind of comfort that may or may not be very well enjoyed in antique bookstores.

At the moment, there weren't many customers though. She shrugged and blamed it on the fact that it was nearly closing time: who buys a book in thirty minutes? Unless of course she already knew exactly what she was looking for, it would take her at least an hour.

First you get comfortable with the new space, smell the scent of the books (old or new? Or printed on that cheap stinky paper? Maybe even leather bound?!), then you scan the store and try to guess where to find what type of book. She'd always talk to the cashier too: making small talk is essential for book shopping. Then it's down to the real hunting, which was of course the best part. She would walk down the racks and if her eyes caught an interesting title, she'd pull it out and start reading.

Once she lost track of time when she was captivated by some story and she was too late to pick Louis up from nursery. She smiled a bit at that thought. She remembered how she rushed to the after school supervision class, panicked and worried sick about her son. Louis on the other hand hadn't even noticed she wasn't there at all: he was too busy running cars down the slide and singing nursery rhymes and chasing after his little friends with pink chubby cheeks.

It reminded her of what happened earlier today, when she had the conversation with the headteacher and the police. Something about the responsibility she had to take today tired her out.

"Hey, Jane?" a voice called from behind her.

She abruptly turned away from the window she'd been staring out of for the past hour to see who startled her.

"Sorry. I didn't mean to scare you. I just–," her co-worker struggled, clearly taken aback by the shocked expression on her face or maybe it was by the tears that stained her cheeks. She didn't even notice she had been crying. Well, maybe she unconsciously decided to keep the clouds some company.

"It's fine James, really I'm ok. What were you saying?"

"It's almost eight," James nearly whispered. "Louis will be here any minute. Dani wanted me to tell you to make sure Louis locks up after himself."

She nodded. "Sure," she said. Even though Louis always locks the shop up, Dani, her boss, still didn't trust him. But Louis did have the reputation to be a rebellious teen and go out partying till late in the morning (even though he hadn't done that in nearly thirteen months).

"See you tomorrow, Jane!" James waved goodbye and left Jane alone in the quiet bookshop.

She got up from the windowsill and stretched her arms out over her head. It had been such a long and exhausting day, and she didn't even get anything done except from staring out the window. She never got anything done anymore. She couldn't wait for Louis to arrive so she could go home and curl up in her bed and not come out until the morning. She slept a lot lately, well if you could count laying down in bed without closing an eye sleeping.

Suddenly she picked up her ears: she could've sworn she heard something.

"Louis?!" Her voice sounded loud in the quiet room and she kind of scared herself with her own volume.