"All my life, since the moment I was born till now, there hasn't been a day where my name wasn't in a newspaper article or my face wasn't plastered on top of some sleazy magazine. There hasn't been a day when I go somewhere and not get hounded by pa...
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
DELILAH ANXIOUSLY TAPS on Chris' granite kitchen counter as he pours her a glass of water. He places the glass in front of her, and takes a seat in the chair next to her, angling it towards her. He nervously blows a breath and watches Delilah drink her water.
"How are you here?" He finally asks. Delilah puts her empty glass down.
"I went to my Dad's place in LA. Uh, a couple days after you called, Selena and Harry went there. They, uh, talked some sense into me. Got me a therapist. So, for the past few weeks, that's what I've been doing. Working on my issues, myself. And I realized that I owe you an explanation." She says, picking at her white nailpolish.
Chris nods. However, before he can speak, Delilah interrupts him. "Listen to me."
"Okay."
"Ever since I was a kid, I was in the spotlight. I mean, you know who my parents are, and the entire world adored them together. When they broke up, everyone was obviously disappointed - but then, there I was. The McCartney-Baizen miracle baby, that's what they called me. Of course, I'm very grateful to have been born to them, I'm so fucking privileged. I have never not gotten what I wanted, never had to work for anything.
"Although, that ruins a person's character, you know. It makes them selfish and narcissistic. Music is what saved me from becoming that monster. My name obviously gave me a lot of advantages, but I stll had to work from the bottom for people to take me seriously. For people to believe the fact that I am not just another privileged, rich white girl. Which I am, but you get the point. For them to believe that I have talent inside me.
"Then, I slowly became successful, and suddenly, everyone was taking about me. I loved it. The world adored me. I was relishing, enjoying, basking in the attention. People were finally listening to me. My opinion, my thoughts mattered. It was intoxicating, like a drug. But just like drugs, it got poisonous after a while.
"It made me believe that I could get away with anything. That I could do what I wanted, who I wanted - and fuck them up and face no consequences whatsoever. It made me feel powerful. It made me become the monster that I was so afraid of becoming.
"But, it started to crash, as expected. People started to see me for who I really was. They saw right through me."
Delilah pauses, and takes a breath. Chris places his right hand on top of hers. She smiles, reassured by the comfort.
"Mark was just another name in my long list of conquests. It was never supposed to turn into anything more. But it did. I got pregnant. Though I was nowhere near ready to have a baby. I have bulimia, and I stress out a lot. I get anxious. The doctor told me that it increased my chances of having a miscarriage. That stressed me out even more. Then one night, after a show, I just snapped. I fainted. Afreen took me to the hospital and they said that I was in no shape to go through a pregnancy. There was a high chance of me not surviving it. And I just couldn't, Chris-"
"Hey, hey, hey. You don't have to explain yourself. It's okay. It's okay to not be ready for parenthood, physically or emotionally. It's not like you're buying a laptop - you're bringing someone to life. That's a big deal. I know you feel like shit, but, Delilah, it's okay. It's okay to not want a baby, right now. It does not make you a monster." Chris interrupts her, touching a warm, soft hand to her face. Delilah's eyes soften.
"Thank you. That, uh, means a lot." Delilah says.
She continues, "I called Mark after I had the abortion. I was sobbing on the phone. I felt so guilty, back then. I was high on pain meds and I was just so depressed. He's such a fucking dick - he took snippets of my part of conversation, and made up that whole article. It was so fucking sick."
Chris nods. "You trusted him, and he manipulated you. He used you when you were at your most vulnerable."
Delilah hums. "Of course, I was no saint. But, what he did, god, I can't even look at him the same anymore. After the hung up, I just - I realized how alone I was. Of course, I had friends. But I didn't have someone that I loved. Someone who loved me back. That was Tom. He was so easy, so simple, and he worshipped me. He loved me, and he looked at me like I hung the moon in the sky. I thought I loved him. I really did. But, then - I met you.
"The first night we were out together, at the carnival - you really looked at me. You listened to me. You took time to really know me, and saw right through my shit. You made me feel vulnerable after a long time, and later, I realized how nice it is to be just that with someone. Chris, you stayed. Even after I said crap to you, even after I refused to leave Tom for good publicity, you stayed. And you called me out on my bullshit whenever I did something wrong. You didn't just take it like everyone does. It's just - you're too good.
"And I wanna say thanks. And, uh, I really, really like you, Chris." Delilah says, shyly, and looks down.
Chris lifts her chin up, and looks her in her eyes. His ocean blue irises darken, almost as if clouds have been cast over it.
Delilah sighs, "I'd understand if you wouldn't wanna be with me -"
"Are you kidding me? Delilah, you're the most amazing person that I've ever met. You're so strong - I would have never guessed that you went through what you went through, to be honest. Delilah, you're smart, kind and so resilient. You're so determined to do the right thing, to be a good person, to not be that narcissist that you forget that that's not who you are, at all. You're willing to accept what you did, and take responsibility for your actions head on. You're compassionate, and honestly, you light up people's worlds. You make me feel so good about myself, Dee. Even when I don't deserve it - not just me, everyone. You make us feel loved. And I feel bad for anyone who couldn't see that."
In a whirlwind of motion, Delilah grabs Chris' face with her hands and leans forward, pressing her lips to his. She kisses him with admiration and gratitude, and Chris kisses her back with just that.
They kiss each other with a hunger that engulfs them, a need for each other, a need to feel complete and infinite within themselves. They kiss as the day melts away, as they forget every earthly concern and every complication that they've faced in the past.
They kiss and slowly dissipate into one person, feeling as though everything they ever needed is right there, right in that moment.
***
sorry I disappeared lol. my mental health's not been the greatest lately tbh. but i'm back now :-)
