Choices

The revelation

A couple of leafs flew by the ground as a cold wind brushed against Donghyuck's face. The sun was covered with clouds but he could still feel its slight warmth on the skin of his hands. Donghyuck looked around him taking in a deep breath as he sat almost lifelessly still on the Park Bench where the memories of him and Jaemin playing in the playground in front of his eyes kept cramming in his head. Donghyuck wanted nothing more than to get up and leave or hope he would get a text from Jaemin that the blonde haired boy wouldn't be able to come. Because now that the day was here he no longer had any of the clarity, he previously held no matter how little it had been. The longer Donghyuck sat their waiting for him the more his nerves got to him.

He kept twirling his phone in his hand to anxious to even open it. Donghyuck wonders if he's ever been this overwhelmed before and if he was to be true to himself he wouldn't be here if he had the choice. He looked up from his lap once again his eyes landing on the swing set in the middle of the playground where two girls were currently swinging on it at full speed probably competing against one another. His mind trailed back to all the times he sat their talking to Jaemin, remembering how they would talk for hours on end sitting on the wooden planks, which were now replaced by plastic ones. Jumping out of the swing and landing on the sandy ground almost felt like an extreme sport back then. Donghyuck internally hits himself for choosing this spot because it was only making him regret his already flaccid decision.

Donghyuck turned his head to the left to see a figure approaching the bench he was currently sitting on. Jaemin was wearing his familiar smile with a simple white t-shirt and black jeans that made him look nothing short of absolutely perfect. The memories that were flooding his mind just a minute ago grew almost stagnant as the slightly taller boy came up to him placing a small kiss on his chapped lips that he couldn't help but reciprocate to. Jaemin took a seat beside the now slightly stunned boy taking his hand in his own as he played with Donghyuck's fingers unmindfully. The action yet small made Donghyuck feel even more guilty about his intention of calling him today as he retreated his hand from Jaemin's lap, tucking it into his jacket pocket.

Jaemin's concerned eyes loomed over Donghyuck's face which only made it that much harder for him to put his thoughts into words. He was pulled out of his blurring thoughts as Jaemin tapped his shoulders softly asking if he was okay. Donghyuck simply nodded clutching onto the insides of his pockets harder as he turned his body slightly towards Jaemin creating just enough space between them for comfort. Donghyuck fiddled with his thumb as he finally gathered enough courage to speak up.

"I called you here because I needed to talk to you" Donghyuck said as Jaemin slowly nodded his head in an almost knowing way before fixing his posture, looking ahead at the playground as Donghyuck carried on

"I- You're a great guy and you're an amazing friend and I really like you..."

"Clearly not enough" Jaemin mumbled incoherently as he brushed a strand of hair falling on his face away from his eyes.

"But I don't think we're meant for each other" Donghyuck continued choosing to ignore Jaemin's words that he couldn't quite make out

"So you love mark?" Jaemin finally asked after brewing in the silence that had followed Donghyuck's words.

"What-"

"I'm not angry I just wanna know why?" Jaemin firmly said turning to look at Donghyuck's flushed face that made him look like a deer caught in headlights.

"It's not you it's...." Donghyuck started only to be interrupted in the middle

"It's me? Come on we all know what that means" Jaemin uttered letting out an exasperated sigh before adding