A Sight For Sore Eyes [HYUNLIX]

CHAPTER 2

[2] 𝐍𝐨𝐭 𝐇𝐚𝐥𝐟 𝐀𝐬 𝐏𝐫𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐲

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   A soft hissing echoed through their small space…the chit chatting became a blank noise to his ears as his gaze remained locked on the silver ring that sparkled under the yellow light above them. He avoided conversation the most he could, still holding a bitter taste on his tongue whenever their eyes would lock, which was most of the time because unfortunately for the gloomy young man, the owner of his slightly shattered heart was sitting right across of him, smiling widely with that perfect smile that just brought happiness to his heart…woefully, the cause of such melodic giggles was not him, but the older Australian member from their group.
Hyunjin could not help but advert his sight from the beef on his plate, to the red haired that sat next to Felix, soon regretting his decision.

Once his eyes latched at their leader, Hyunjin could not help but compare himself to what Chan could offer. The oldest had a bright personality, an factor that attracted many by how approachable he seemed, he had those gentle eyes that showed trust and calmness, he always knew the exact words to say whenever someone needed advice, he knew when to be gentle and when to go straight to the point…on the other hand, Hyunjin saw himself as cold and hard to approach. He had a tendency to give a judging glare whenever he heard something either confusing or what he would call weird, he never intends to be rude, but for people who had yet to know the real him Hyunjin seems judgmental, not an attractive trait.
A soft sigh escaped his plump lips as his gaze returned to the plate on his front, yet the thoughts kept flooding into his mind, reminding him of why the other would be so much better than him.

Chan and Felix are Australian, they can understand each other better than anyone else can. He on the other hand, could only see things from an outsider’s perspective, not really understanding certain stuff Felix seemed to love so dearly. Chan was a dear, always there for anyone who needed him, no matter how beaten down he himself is…he will always help. Hyunjin, however, is scared to getting too close to some, he will try his best to help but that fear of people abandoning him once they met him deeply always lingered in the back of his head, forcing him to remain a tad bit cold towards others…perhaps one of the reasons he has find himself unable to tell Felix about these sentiments he has hold for months.
Not only that, but his insecurities slowly started to eat his mind as well. Unconsciously, Hyunjin softly brushed his fingertips against his lower lip, noticing just how plump his lips really were. He glanced up at Chan, noticing how his, although also plump, were still slimer than his which had a more attractive look in the younger’s eyes. The small thought caused him to force his mouth into a thin line, attempting to tin his lips…unsuccessfully.

“Hyunjin, are you ok?” Felix asked as he leaned closer to the table, noticing the slight worry that was hidden behind those black orbs. Hyunjin could feel his heart beating faster at the sudden attention but hid his nervousness with a distant smile.

“I’m fine” he answered, which only brought doubtful look from the younger, bringing Hyunjin to panic. When Felix opened his mouth to speak, Hyunjin had beat him by a question.

“anyways, what happened with that egg of yours? One day it was at the fridge and the next it was gone” The sudden question seemed to have taken Felix aback.

“what egg?” he softly asked, sitting normally once more as the previous tension started to dissolve.

“the one you drew a face on, and told us to not eat because a friend gave it to you” Hyunjin followed as he rested his face on his hand, a small smile appearing on his face as he noticed the sudden shine Felix’s eyes got at the memory of such time…it was the smallest details that brought his heart to such intense feeling, everything about the blonde just seemed beautiful to Hwang.

Felix continued to a small rant about the whole life story of “Lee Jr.” how he had called his egg once he finished drawing the face. Although to others it might had seemed Hyunjin was invested into the story, the reality was that the older was not listening at all. He just got lost into those mesmerizing eyes as the deep voice of his beloved became a lullaby for his subconscious –which registered how Felix would recite each vocal with that accent he had. However, mid-sentence of the final days, the blonde sneezed rather loudly, catching the attention of a certain red hair at his side.
Before Hyunjin could remove his own sweater –which he had originally brought before changing outfits for the photoshoot– Chan had taken his off and placed it on Felix’s shoulder, giving the smallest a warm smile.

“if you were cold you could had just told me” Chan said laughing, which made Felix’s cheek burn a shade of red. Hyunjin tried to brush off the action “He is embarrassed” he told himself as his smile returned to that distant monotone look “it’s just embarrassment, nothing else…they are just friends.” However, what Felix did next shocked not only him, but Chan as well.

“thank you, Hyung…” the smaller whispered softly, feeling small under the warm fabric as he properly wore it. Chan simply ruffled his hair, started a new conversation with the younger Australian…soon cut short once the blonde interrupted Bang by kissing his cheek. A token of appreciation was what Felix tried to excuse his action with. But by the love-struck expression Bang had, Hwang felt it was something more than that.

Hyunjin could feel the tears start to accumulate on his eyes, even when his face remained numb, his heart was an explosion of different emotions…each one affecting his mind negatively. All he wanted to do was slam the table, he wanted to yell at both, to scream out his frustration and steal Felix away. He wanted to cry loudly while hugging the reason of his misery…but he could not. That would be selfish of his part, causing a scene just to force the man who stole his heart to reciprocate his feelings was not what he truly wanted. No matter how bad he wanted Felix to hug him with such love, no matter how much he wanted to be the reason behind that smile, he would not force the youngest to do something he did not want to. So, all the pinkett could do was looking away once more staring intensely at the now cold meat on his plate as he tried to contain each tear while not making any noise.

He had succeeded at distancing himself from conversation once more, and when he felt safe enough, he stopped trying to contain the salty water. Sadly, the tears betrayed him as one by one they slipped down his now rosy cheeks silently. His hands started to shake the more his tears kept flowing down and even if he tried, he was no longer able to stop them from falling down their faucet.

“I wish I were Chan…” he whispered, his tone raspy and broken as the words slipped out his mouth. Although the sound was so faint, one person still managed to hear the searing words.