Better Man (P.L.)

12.

She laid in his hotel room bed, her head resting on his chest as she stared blankly at the ceiling.

As Jason's father was loaded with money, they had bribed the guard outside the room to keep his mouth shut on Olivia's visits and on the drugs Jason kept. Nobody knew that they were both breaking the rules of the restraining order, and that Jason was being visited.

Olivia wasn't sure what possessed her to go to him the night she was released. Maybe it was the need for something to numb the pain. Maybe it was the hole left in her heart from leaving Paul. Or maybe, she was just plain desperate for something normal.

All she knew was that she felt drained and empty, and couldn't be bothered to plaster a smile on her face daily without a stimulant.

She wasn't going to school, Kim bringing her work while she finished 'recovering' from the attack. She spent her nights while her father was asleep with Jason, taking drugs, and then went home, sleeping the day away until Kim showed up every day at 3:30 like clockwork.

Neither Kim nor Leonardo noticed the difference in Olivia, assuming that her reasons for acting strangely was the attack, the returning memories from the night she OD'd, and her breakup with Paul. Nobody suspected she was on drugs.

"How about some Molly?" Jason suddenly asked, Olivia nodding slowly.

"Yeah. That sounds nice." She spoke, her tone flat and monotone. Jason smirked, standing up.

Truthfully, he was enjoying this. His favorite Olivia was broken Olivia, and he especially loved being the one to break her. Broken Olivia meant she needed someone to fix her, and there he was, like a hero to keep her safe.

That other kid couldn't protect her like could, couldn't make her feel like he did, and most importantly, couldn't break her like he did.

That boy was ruining all of Jason's hard work, and he refused to let that happen.

He went back to the bed, opening Olivia's mouth and dropping the small white pill in, closing it for her. "Enjoy, baby."

Olivia swallowed, closing her eyes for the first time since she had arrived. Jason watched with satisfaction while she let out a breath, her body relaxing at the effects.

He lit a blunt, watching how she turned to her side, her chest moving up and down softly. Her hands moved across herself, her back arching.

"More." She breathed out, pushing the stray strand of hair that had falling out of her messy bun away from her face. "Please."

"Your wish is my command." She and Jason continued to get high, Olivia leaving an hour before her father woke up with a bag fall of small white pills for herself.

"Let loose during the day, baby." Jason had told her, with a wink. "You've earned it."

How she made it home, she wasn't sure. She drove, yet the drive was a bore and if you asked, she couldn't recall it for you. She parked, sneaking into her bedroom and into her bed, falling asleep as soon as her head hit the pillow.

The moment she woke up, she was alone in the house, and she had time until Kim showed up. So, with the breakfast that her father had left for her, Olivia popped two of those white tablets into her mouth, drinking orange juice to wash them down.

The effects were instantaneous, Olivia feeling as though she was floating. She didn't feel the remnants of the attack on her body, didn't feel the pain of losing Paul, and the pull to take him back. She didn't feel alone, as she had since she was in the hospital.

She felt nothing.

The feeling was so nice, she couldn't stop taking the pills until they were all gone, closing her eyes with a groan. She instantly regretted the decision when a knock sounded, looking at the clock kn her nightstand to see it was already 3:30.

"Fuck." She whispered to herself, tripping out of bed. Another knock sounded, this time Kim calling out her name.

"Olivia?"

"Coming!" She yelled back, sliding on her slippers. She tried to walk as calmly and straight as she could, tried to straighten herself out.

She opened the door, forcing a smile. If anything, she could tell Kim that she was just tired and sluggish. "Hey."

"Hey." Kim walked in, smiling as usual. "So, they didn't assign too much today, but we do have annotations due in English."

Olivia nodded closing the door. "Yeah, that's fine."

They went up the stairs, Kim noticing how off Olivia seemed today. She could barely make it up, staring at each step as if it was a mile away. Her eyes were unfocused and dilated, her hands always out to steady herself.

Kim didn't say anything yet, though. Olivia was having a rough time lately and for all Kim knew, she was living through the effects of the imprint, fighting against the pull to be with Paul. Nobody had experienced that, not even Emily, as she and Sam saw each other a lot during that time. Olivia and Paul, though, hadn't seen each other at all since the hospital.

They made it to her room, Kim pulling out all the supplies and starting. Olivia tried to follow along, she really did, but it was difficult when she was still riding out a high. She kept zoning out, blinking frequently to try to focus.

She attempted to keep up, writing when Kim wrote, and trying her best to answer all of Kim's questions, but it was too late, Kim had noticed that she was out of it. "Liv, you okay?"

Olivia nodded so hard, she thought her head might fall off. "I'm fine, great even!" Even she winced at the loud pitch her voice took on. She lowered it, clearing her throat. "I mean, I'm a bit tired, but other than that, I'm okay."

"Okay." Kim chewed on the inside of her lip, not questioning Olivia further. "You know what, we're practically done here, I can finish it for both of us. You get some rest and I'll get out of your hair."

"Wait, Kim-"

"See you tomorrow, Liv." Kim left the house, already dialing Jared's number and calling as soon as she was in her car.

"Hey babe, what's up? Done so soon? Are you coming back to Emily's?"

"I think Olivia's doing drugs again."