Biden POV
"Joe, I'm leaving you," my wife said at lunch. She slammed the divorce papers in front of me. The bowl of soup I was eating splashed and got all over my suit.
"What? No," I said sadly. I loved Jill, why would she do this.
"Your lead in the election wasn't big enough," she complained.
"Oh, come on!" I yelled. "My lead was just as big as Trump's."
"That doesn't matter," she sighed. "Not big enough." She walked out of the house and slammed the door.
I started to cry. The tears fell into my soup.
Trump POV
"Ok, time to find that little bitch," I said to myself. I put on the helmet of my battle armor. I had it made in the beginning of the year in case World War III ended up being a thing. I took out my iPhone. "Hey Siri, where does Joe Biden live?"
"Joe Biden lives in Delaware," she told me.
"Ok, thanks, babe." I put my phone away.
"Donald, who are you talking to?"
Oh shit. Melania.
"No one, love!" I said. Just then, she burst into the oval office, making me jump.
"I heard you talking to someone! Someone named Babe!"
"Babe, I-"
She gasped and brought her hands to her mouth. Tears gathered in her eyes. "My name is Melania," she cried. "We're through, Donald."
"No, Melania, wait!" I yelled after her. But it was too late. Her, Baron, Ivanka, Donald Jr., Eric, and Tiffany had already gotten in my Rolls-Royce and were driving out the front gate.
"No!"
All I could do was watch them go. I sat in the oval office and cried.
