The Mark Of Cain

The River Shall End At The Source.

        So after Dean had tortured and beaten Metatron up in the bunker and Cas had taken him away and to delivered him back to Heaven he kept running those few words over and over in his mind.
"The river shall end at the source."

He sat at the table, looking off into the distance of the room. He almost didn't even noticed Sam come into the room, until he sat infront of him. Sam looked gently at his older brother and he could see him struggling and broken. Sam looked down at his brother's hand which was shaking a tad bit.

Sam- "Hey, you know we are going to figure this out right?"

Dean raised his head and meet his brother's eyes. He saw that Sam seemed hopeful and he couldn't tell Sammy that there probably was no hope left. That he most likely won't be rid of this mark, and that what he feared the most was turning dark again and harming Sammy. Dean dropped his eyes from Sam's and looked down at the Mark for a moment.

Sam- "Dean?"
Sam questioned his big brother. He was consured for Dean's well being and he wanted to let his big brother know, that he was there for him and he wasn't going to let him down. He was going to save his ass for a change. Dean heared Sam's voice as an echo, it wasn't totally clear or loud but it was there, and he figured it was best to reasurre his little brother that: Yeah everything was going to okay, even if he didn't believe a single word. Dean looked back up at Sammy, his eyes meeting Sammy's big puppy dog eyes. Dean gave a faint smile and a nodded.

Dean- "Yeah."
Dean blinked and looked at Sam who gave his brother a smile of understanding that it was al going to work out eventually.

        Later that evening, Dean sat alone in his room, listening to some music. It was on full volume, blocking out the world around him but what he mostly wanted to block was the power that the Mark of Cain had over him.

Even though the music was playing loudly, all he could hear was Metatron's voice repeating and repeating those few words over and over again, and Dean couldn't find a way to block it out. He was soo mad that Sam and Cas came in when they did, he was about to get him to tell more when they bursted the door down and hurried Metatron out the door. They were protecting that monster who took Cas's Grace from him, then casted out all the Angels and made Gadreel kill Kevin using Sammy's hands and then of course killing him, and they pushed him quickly out the door and whisked him back up to Heaven.

"The river shall end at the source." Played over and over in Dean's mind.
"What could it mean???" Dean quickly threw off his headphones and walked out of his room, he couldn't sit in his bed any longer. He walked down the hall and made his way to the dungeon.
"The river, maybe meaning the mark" : Dean thought. "The source, the source..."

        Inside the dungeon, Dean stared at the empty chair in the middle of the room. Dean soon began to get flashes of him punching Metatron and slowly pulling the angel blade out and holding it under his chin. He remembered the feeling he got for torturing Metatron, it felt soo good, and cool. Calmness just washed over him and all his worries and stress just slipped away from his finger tips and all he could feel was the cold metal of the angel blade in his hand. He closed his eyes tightly remembering it all. His steady hand slowly drawing a red line down his throat and the joy he felt over seeing his dark red blood. He would have continued until he had gotten his answer and had killed him, but if that had happened and Sammy and Cas didn't come in when they did he would have been sucked back into that endless darkness that now laid inside him, that was too close to the surface. He most likely would have feed the Mark and possibly became dark once again and the information about removing the Mark would only lie with him and at that moment of darkness and being calm he wouldn't have given up the secrets of removing it.

Dean got a tad light headed and backed up against the wall. The room was spinning a little bit and Dean opened his eyes. He looked down and rubbed his fingers over the Mark. He allowed his legs to fall from under him and he meet the cold floor of the dungeon. He kept rubbing his figner tips over the Mark and closed his eyes seeing so much choas and pain he has caused with it.

Sam- "Dean?"

Dean opened his eyes hearing Sam's voice calling him off in the distance. He pulled his sleave down, covering up the Mark and he pushed himself up onto his feet. He could hear Sam's feet making their way towards the dungeon. Dean moved towards the opening in the dungeon and stopping when Sam rushed by real quickly. Sam backed up, his hair a little in his face. He pushed it away from his eyes and looked at his big brother.

Sam- "Dean what's going on? You okay?"
Sam made his way into the dungeon. Dean turned from Sam and walked a little around the room before he said anything, but he kept his eyes from meeting Sam's.

Sam- "Dean, are you alright?"

Dean- "Yeah Sammy I'm good. What do you want?"

Sam- "I umm..." Sam lowered his eyes brows and was picking up on Dean's harsh, hard tone of voice but he ignored it and continued to speak. "I was thinking about what you told us that Metatron said about removing the Mark. That the river shall..."

Dean- "Shall end at the source! Yeah I've already told you this and we aren't any closer to removing this...this god damn Mark!"

Sam looked over at Dean as he continued to pace around the room of the dungeon.

Sam- "Dean..."

Dean- "What?!"

Sam- "I was going over what Metatron said and I was thinking..."

Dean- "What?"

Sam looked at Dean questioning and worry was all in his eyes.
Sam- "Dean are you sure your okay?"

Dean- "How many times to I gotta say I'm fine! I swear the next time someone asks, I'm gonna..."

Sam- "Dean?!"

Dean- "Dude what?!"

Sam- "Nothing."
Sam thought it was best to wait to get into a conversation about what was wrong with Dean and his feelings. He thought it was best to just say what he thought and found about what Metatron had said.

Sam- "The source of the Mark came from Cain right? So, maybe if we locate Cain he might know a way to remove it from you or something. What you think?"

Dean looked over at Sam then his eyes drifted back down to his arm where the Mark was at. Sam noticed his big brother looking at his arm.

Sam- "Dean?"

Sam was soo worried about Dean and the thought of him going dark cause he wasn't paying attention to all the little changes in his brother. He wanted that Mark off Dean soo much, he just wanted to look into his big brother's eyes ans see the old Dean he loved the most and who no matter what only saw him and protected Sammy from the world, but this Dean was colder and wasn't the same as the big brother who raised him. Dean wasn't the same.

Yeah Sam saw bits of the old Dean when he cured him of being a demon but the Mark had changed him soo much and Sam had this fear in the back of his mind.
"What if after all of this, Dean doesn't return to his old big protector, hero brother he once was. What if he is damaged and broken in ways that no matter what was fixed and put back together he wouldn't return to himself. What if the person he used to know was lost forever within himself."

Sam tired to push back his fears to not let Dean see how hard it was for him to be the strong one, the one who would fix everything and how much he was struggling with Dean not being Dean.