Destiny or Coincidence ✔

Stay

I tiptoe around the room as quietly as possible, trying my best not to wake Taehyung up. I gather my clothes and enter his bathroom to get dressed. Looking at myself in the mirror, I can see the marks he left behind on my skin. For the first time, I see sex marks and I don't scowl at myself, and try to make them disappear. For the first time, I look at the marks left behind and I wish to be able to tattoo them on my skin permanently.  The longer I look at them, the more I question if I really want to leave right now.

What if Taehyung's right? Maybe there is a possibility for us to work out. Maybe this could be the start of a real relationship with someone who is willing to love me the way I dreamed someone would since I was a child. I open the door slightly, taking a look at his still sleeping figure, and I see it. I see the possible future I could have with this amazing man who spent all night teaching me the values of love and why it could be worth it.

I see us going out on dates where we'll be the cute couple that steals random kisses in public. We'll go to dinner and sit across from each other so we can play footsy underneath the table. I can see him comforting me when I feel down every time I hear about my parents living their best lives apart from each other and me, and I can see myself holding him when he's had a bad day at work. I would learn what his favorite foods are and have them ready for him after a long day as well as being woken up every morning by one of his kisses that feels like heaven.

I see us growing together and learning all our quirks and habits. Things men in my last relationship thought were annoying, like my laugh and my love for plushies, he would find absolutely adorable. I keep looking at Taehyung and I can see him bending down on one knee someday asking me to be his and only his forever. 

I see the nights filled with passion where he traps me within the four walls of his room, and makes love to me like he did last night. Where he strips me bare, not only physically, but emotionally, spiritually. We'd spend all hours of the night showing the other how deep our love is. His hands will treat me as if it was our first time again, while he shows me an intimate side of himself that only I'm allowed to experience. Maybe one of those nights will take our passion a step further, allowing me to carry the evidence of our possible love. He would rub my tummy to sleep and wake up at random hours of the night because our little one and I would have a weird craving for pickles and ice cream. He will cry the first time he holds the love we made, and he will ask for us to make another one immediately. I would smack him and tell him he's crazy, but internally I would want nothing more than to have a big family with him. And just like the song said, the people who would witness our love, will start believing in love themselves. Life would be perfect and I would be happy.

But that is not the way life is, and I'm not deserving of it. With that single thought in mind, I wipe the tears that had welled up in my eyes and walk back to the restroom to finish putting my clothes on. "Don't be delusional, Jin," I whisper to myself. "You can have anything you want in life. You can afford anything you want in life, but not that. Love is the only thing you will never afford." I roll my eyes at how stupid the idea of being with him was and finally get the courage to leave the bathroom.

As soon as I open the door, I see that Taehyung is already awake. The disappointment in his face is evident as he slips out of bed to put his underwear back on. "I have to leave. Yoongi must be worried that I didn't spend the night at home."

Taehyung gives me a slight nod as he starts searching through drawers to put clothes on. "What if I asked you stay, a little longer?" He asks still facing away from me.

"Tae," I sigh. "You said one night," I state softly. 

He sighs in defeat, and turns back to me. "I understand," he says softly. I respond with a nod and start heading out. "Thank you," he says making me stop halfway out his front door. "I understand that this is not what you want, but I want you to know that yesterday was the most fun I've ever had with anyone. Thank you for giving some of your time to a hopeless romantic like me. Getting to know you the past several hours, I've learned my first impression of you being a stick in the mud was wrong. I hope one day you can try to look past the people who have hurt you and focus on the ones who love you. I really wish that you find the love of your life. Even if you refuse to believe in it, you deserve to be happy."

I quickly rush out, knowing that if I stayed any longer I would not have the courage to leave. The ache in my heart tells me to go back to him. To run to his arms and tell him I want to take a chance in us. But the pounding in my head just wants me to go home and forget that the last several hours even happened.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

My updates for this story just keep getting slower and I apologize for that. I will be updating once a week as there is only 3 chapters left. Thank you all for your patience.