Unfathomable

Nurse Kenny

She gasped for breath as an alarm filled her room. Her heart pounded in her chest as she sat up quickly in bed. The alarm shut off almost as soon as it started. She could taste her morning breath and wondered what the last thing she ate was. She could feel her eyes stinging as tears threatened to break through her sleepy eyes for more times that she could count at this point. 

Her stomach aches and her muscles were sore. She took a look at her life and where it was right now and she didn't know what to do. She had no family and has no friends and now she is all alone inside the psych ward. 

I haven't even been talked to yet. Why has no one spoken to me?

She stopped and stared into the veil of nothingness as she remembered what happened last night. 

I heard a voice. Someone or something more likely spoke to me last night. It said something that kept me up for hours, how could I have forgotten that that had happened?

Her train of thought was interrupted by the door opening. This time, it was a person.

A woman in fact, she was dressed like a nurse and had a surprisingly warm face due to the circumstances. She had dirty blonde hair that was tied up in a bun. There was a red pen sticking out of the top of the bun and it reminded Riley of a motherly presence. Not her mother exactly but someone who cared about what would happen to her.

"Good morning Riley, it's nice to see that you're awake." She took a quick breath and flashed me a genuine smile. "I'm nurse Kenny McGlaughin. But, you can just call me Kenny." She said this as she walked around the room looking under and around things.

Riley assumed that she was probably looking for anything that she could harm herself with. But Riley didn't even have the energy to do that too herself. She was exhausted from the day before and she didn't even know why. She hadn't done anything all day and she mostly just slept. She pushed this thought to the side and looked at Kenny.

"Is there anything that I can eat? I am really hungry." Riley said hoping to be able to get out of this room. Kenny looked at her and smiled.

"Yes breakfast gets served in an hour, but first we need to get you to a psychiatrist so we can find out what medications you need." She said this without looking Riley in the eye.

She almost seemed like she was trying to get the sentence out without Riley asking questions. Which of course was a waste of time.

"What do you mean medications? There's nothing wrong with me?"

"What about that gash on your arm there huh?" She said looking at Riley smugly. "The painkillers we gave you are going to wear off soon and you're going to be in a lot of pain."

Riley looked down at her arm puzzled. She had completely forgotten about it. The whole reason she was in here, and she forgot. She was unable to recall the hardest thing that she has put herself through. 

Why do I keep forgetting these things? These are big moments in my life and I am just completely spacing them. If I forget anything else I feel like I might lose myself, just like Dad did. 

She felt tears threaten again but this time Kenny stopped them. She kneeled down next to Riley who still hadn't left the bed. 

"Look, I know that this may seem hard right now and you're probably scared shitless. But you don't need to worry. I'm going to do whatever I can to keep you safe and get you home as soon as possible." Kenny smiled another genuine smile and grabbed Rileys hand.

Riley looked into her blue eyes and almost smiled back. 

Kenny got her up and pulled in a cart covered in items. Out of these items she pulled out some muted color clothes and a pair of shoes that were tiptied together.

Riley looked at the shoes and then back to Nurse Kenny. "Why are the zip tied?" Riley asked confused. Kenny stifled a small giggle.

"This is kind of morbid but, it's so we don't have any 'accidental' hangings or strangulations around here." She said offering her the articles of clothing at the sametime. She turned around to give Riley some privacy. 

Riley flushed as she took off her shirt. Her stomach and chest were covered in scars and marks. They were signs of her insecurities and she hated them more than anything. Her chest rose and fell with her quick breathing.  She pulled the blue crew neck shirt over her head and pulled the pants up over her pale marked legs.

She put the shoes on and realized how uncomfortable everything fit on her
The shirt was scratchy and the pants were too baggy.. she felt out in the open even though she was completely covered..
She felt, vulnerable.
She cleared her throat to let Kenny know she was finished.

"Good job Riley, there's one task completed for today, now it's on to the next one. Let's go meet your doctor.