[Before the first Thor, in Asgard, angst (TT)]
You sat at your table, legs crossed on the chair as your chin rested on your palms. You sighed and looked at the door to your bathroom, where Loki was in. You were finally off today, from your stressful job as Odin's advisor. But you loved it. You couldn't get enough of telling the King how to make the right choices. Similar to how you love Loki. He's been your friend since forever.
He was in your bathroom because he was going to sneak out of here and go into town with Sif. She has been his girlfriend for a few months and they have been romancing. It was pretty dark and you were in your pajamas. Being from Midgard originally, you still kept their traditions.
"Lokes," You knocked on the door and leaned your ear on it, "You are taking forever to get ready!" You say and Loki chuckles, opening the door, not realising that you were there. You landed on his chest. You look up and step back, giggling. "Whoops." You mutter and look at Loki. "Whoa, whoa, wHoA, WHOA!" You say in awe and Loki chuckles with a blush.
"Why are you so starstruck? This is my normal-"
"Don't you darreeeeee lieeeeeeee!" You say as you gesture him to spin. He does so and you cover your mouth, your nose bleeding.
"Your nose!" Loki says in panic and you scoff.
"Don't distract me! You look amazing!" You say and he smiles weakly.
"Your nose is still bleeding, [Y/n]." He says and you nod.
"I'll sort that shit out, bro. Just," You pat his cheek, "Do me proud and keep Sif happy." You say and Loki nods.
"Will do, Mrs. Sif." He says, saluting and you hit his back as you walk to the bathroom.
"Take care of my baby and if you hurt her," You turn and do some disturbing hand actions, "I'll fuck you up." You conclude and walk in the bathroom.
"Yes, ma'am." He says back and you close the door. With a sigh, you stare at yourself in the mirror.
"Damn," You say as you touch the blood dripping down, "A nosebleed for Loki." You say and chuckle, getting cleaned up.
"I'm heading out now, love!" He says in a whisper-yell and you sigh, leaning on the sink.
"Ok, Lokes." You mumble and hear him leave. You get cleaned up and walk out of the bathroom that was connected to your bedroom, being alone again. You look around and decide to read. But before you did that, out of your window you saw Loki hugging Sif for a second before pulling away. He intertwined his fingers with hers as they went far far away.
"Damn, I really wish you were gay." You mutter. You'd rather see Loki with a another man, at least you'd ship the hell out of them. But he loves Sif, your best friend. You suggest as you repeated the words in your head.
I wish you were gay, I wish you were gay.
You sighed and groaned, sitting down. You open your book and begin to read but you couldn't concentrate.
You only thought of how happy Loki was to run off to Sif.
Why were you the one that he couldn't see?
Are you invisible?
Is he blind?
Possibly.
"Fucking hell!" You shut the book with force and get up, throwing a coat over your shoulders as you covered your head, you left the castle through yours and Loki's secret way. That's until he told Sif. Luckily, the secret passage changes every time someone wants to use it. You were going to follow Loki and Sif, wherever they were of to, and ruin their relationship of a few months.
You followed the [Favourite Flower] that led you to the passage and you ended up following Loki and Sif to town, them too in love to notice your presence. Which was good to an extent.
They went to a party with some of Sif's friends and they looked so in love. Loki looked so in love. You sighed as your heart fell. You looked away, backing away from the bush that you were in. How could you do this to them? Them especially? You'd never. You couldn't, wouldn't, shouldn't. They trust you and you want to break them up?
You scoffed at yourself and walked away, back to the castle. What you didn't know was that Loki had seen you creeping in the bushes in pajamas and wanted to approach you but you walked away.
He pardoned himself from Sif and rushed after you. You were tempted to cry but you didn't, you were a warrior. You walked slolwy back to the castle when you realized something, there is nothing for you in Asgard. The one you love, loves another so you should just move on with your life. Maybe you could go down to Midgard. You mentally agreed with that when you felt a hand on your shoulder.
You swept the person off their feet as you turned around, bringing them to their knees as you put your knife to their throat.
"Heyyy.." Loki greeted and you gasped, smiling nervously as you backed away, helping him to his feet. "That was a good move. You should teach it to me sometime." He said with a smirk and you chuckled.
"Haha, thank you. But I don't think I'll be able to do that." You said and Loki raised a brow.
"What do you mean?" He asked and you kept a straight face.
"I'm thinking of going back to Midgard." You say and Loki looks at you, his eyes shocked and his face paler than usual. "You know, just for a while." You lied and he let out a breath of a laugh.
"You're joking, right?" He asked with a smile and you shook your head, patting his shoulder.
"Sorry, Lokes. But Midgard needs me." You said and walked away, leaving Loki feeling a bit empty that his best friend was leaving. For good, this time.
As you walked away, you silently cried into your fist but refused to let anymore tears out as you wiped them, walking to your secret passage.
"I'm not being selfish, Loki doesn't need me anymore, he has Sif and she has him." You convinced yourself as you snuck into your room. You removed your cloak and went straight to bed. You just layed there, eyes open as your head throbbed.
"You see why I wish you were gay, Lokes?"
