LUVIE [fin. / unedited]

o n e

luvie - four years ago

The only word running through my head was: pregnant

I slowly started to notice when I got sicker by the day, I didn't get sick. Even more, I don't throw-up and that's all I've been doing for the past week. I sigh, taking a deep breath and get out of the car. I have to tell him, it's his right to know... he's the father and he has a right to know, this is only fair. I coach myself through it walking up to William with a bunch of his friends. I approach William, taking a deep breath and tapping him on his shoulder.

"William, can I talk to you?" I quietly asked him, "Yeah, sure." I look around to see all his friends still there. "Like in private?" I asked him. He nodded and pointed to the car, "Let me say bye to the guys then I'll be over there." I head over to the car, get in and take deep breaths...there is nothing to worry about. Everything will be okay, and I'm telling him as a courtesy and to see if he would like it. I don't lie to myself and I won't start now.

When William gets in the car he looks at me impatiently. I take a deep breath, I am strong. I remind myself. "Do you truly love me?" I bluntly asked him. He stops for a moment to answer hesitantly; "Ye-Yes I do." He stutters a bit, "Do you though?" I ask him, he gives me a look and rolls his eyes, "Remember you're the one who slept with me," He said, he has a point. I take a deep breath, "I am pregnant, William." He looks at me, hates clouding his eyes. "William, it's yours." I calmly tell him. "Take care of it." It is all he says he turns around not facing me anymore, blankly looking into space.

I bit back a cry, I can't. I can't. I can't. I think to myself. I take a deep breath, this is what he wants. I phoned my mom real quick explaining how I was going to go to the clinic. Of course, bring a mom she asked why, and off course not being stupid, I told her we'll talk about it later.

When I arrived at the clinic, I looked around noticing how there were not a lot of people around. I put my name on the list, how would people react if they knew an eighteen-year-old was pregnant? I quietly sat it back down, waiting for my name to be called.

After a few minutes of waiting a nurse comes out calling my name. "Ms Luvie Rigressa," the nurse says. I stand up and quickly follow her. "We'll be here in room one," She says, "Oops! Where are my manners? I'm Nurse Ellia," Nurse Ellia told me. I smile, "I'm Luvie."

"Ah, yes. We're here," She points me to a room on the right. When I get inside the room she hands me a hospital gown. I take it, she smiles at me. "You listed confidential on Reason, why is that?" I take a deep breath. "Umm...I'm pregnant..." She smiles, "Congratulations, but I'm sensing there are no congratulations in store." She says with a frown. I nod, "Yeah...I would like to ...make it go away." She nods again, "Okay," she walks over to the cabinet where a small iPad is sitting.

"Before you get an abortion we have a video you to have to watch," She says with a knowing smile. I nod my head, she hands me the iPad. I click the play button. She walks out of the room leaving me to watch the video. When I'm done with the video she comes back in, I was in a trance thinking to myself. "So, do you still want to go through with it?" She asks me, I shake my head. "I don't think I could do that to do something that didn't do that to me. It was my fault...I'll go through with it." I say in a quiet voice.

"Okay, instead would you like an ultrasound?" Nurse Ellia asked me. I nod my head, "Okay, if you could follow me and we'll go to the ultrasound room." I nod. I quickly follow her out of one room and to the other.

"Come back soon," Nurse Ellia says, handing me the ultrasound of the twins. I give her a small smile. Time to go tell Mom. I think to myself. I wonder if I could go to Uncle Eli's farm for a little bit. I walk out of the clinic doors, hoping never to go there again. Slightly accepting the fact that I'm one and a half months pregnant with twins.