His List

Chapter Two

Aubrey

Half an hour passed by quickly, yet I still couldn't quite get myself to focus on the movie.

Not only was I feeling a bit weird and paranoid just by being alone inside the cinema, thinking about all the possible situations I could be in, this boy beside me just cannot find any reason to shut the hell up.

If his surprised reactions every time a good scene would come up were an indication, it was obvious that it was his first time watching the movie. He also found it as his job to unnecessarily comment on every little detail, even though nobody really cared about what he was saying.

"Oooh. Jamie knows what's up," he remarked, amused, during the scene where Jamie tells Landon to promise not to fall in love with her. When Landon smirked and told Jamie it wouldn't be a problem, he chuckled and from my peripheral vision, I saw him giving me a slight glance. "He's gonna get whipped, isn't he?"

It took physical effort to suppress the urge to roll my eyes and to remain quiet, ignoring his question or any statement he would throw at me. Although a few of his comments were understandable and I, myself, would agree to, his loudness was causing us some attention, and it really annoyed me.

Along with coldness, I was also not a big fan of attention either. Having people's eyes on you not only feels weird, but it feels taunting, too, as if though their stares could easily eat you and digest you into the deepest pit of the world. If that was my gate to the after life, sure, that'll be great. But it wasn't.

I snapped out of my thoughts just in time for the scene where Jamie runs away from Landon as the now fallen boy tells her reasons why she was scared.

"Because you wanna be with me, too," I whispered along with Landon as he told Jamie those words.

The words felt so familiar, so known, each one memorized and engraved on my mind. It was just one of the many lines that stayed in my head ever since I've first watched it.

For me, this scene was one of the most powerful scenes in the movie. It showed Jamie's vulnerability for Landon and the realistic fact that people really are afraid to fall in love.

Fearing love is normal, especially when there is expected pain involved.

But in Jamie's case, it wasn't just her fear of falling in love, but also her fear of not being with Landon when she dies. That one line just speaks volume.

The arrogant boy beside me suddenly scoffed, earning a side glance from me, "What do you mean she's scared? Who even gets scared of falling in love?"

I finally rolled my eyes. At this point, it was getting harder and harder for me not to talk back.

This man was obviously clueless, and even though I had told myself that it wasn't my business and not to meddle with him, I had the greatest urge to prove him wrong. It was indeed my favorite movie he was questioning.

And so I spoke.

"Apparently, Mr., you have never heard, 'love equals pain' before," I retorted, which made his head turn to my direction. His face resembling an expression of amusement.

"Well, of course, there is pain," he replied with a smile. Unlike his annoying confident smirk, his smile rather seemed genuine - the sight of it weirdly comforting.

"That's how the world is. You get ups and downs, and love, especially love, is not an exception to that rule. Pain is inevitable. Pain demands to be felt," he explained fervently.

I looked at him, slightly amazed with his knowledge of John Green's great novel, but his charm only irked me more. The more he made himself seem deserving of the confidence he carried, the more it annoyed me. I hated the fact I couldn't seem to point out something about him that was arguably worthy to be an insult.