I'm Commin' Home - Superjail Fanfic!

Just Like Every Other Day

"Welcome back, Jackknife..."
Jared looked up and saw Jailbot carrying the prisoner back to the jail cell he had always stayed in, just like every other day. He heard somebody walking closer behind him, it was Alice.
“Hey loser” She punched his arm and shoved him out of the way, “Get back to work, don’t you have something to be doing? Or kissing the Warden’s ass or something?”  And just like every other day he stayed silent, and slowly walked to the Warden’s Office.
He opened the door and stared at The Warden, fixing the crooked pile of papers on his desk.
“Ah! Hello Jared how are you today?” The Warden smiled at Jared, showing off his almost positive attitude.
He wiped the sweat off of his forehead and smiled “I’m just fine sir, I-“
“Never mind I don’t care, anyways, I was thinking that we could build a new POOL for the prisoners! It’s pretty hot outside and I won’t have any prisoners if they die from heat exhaustion! Wonderful idea right, Jared?”
“Uhhh, of course sir, but…” his voice cracked, he stuttered, usually he didn’t oppose The Warden’s ideas, not since what happened last time…
“I think that a library would be better for them, so many great books to fill their heads with knowledge, so they can be successful in the real world!”
The Warden scoffed and leaned back in his chair, “What a terrible idea, Jared I don’t think you understand, this is their home, our goal is to keep the inmates IN Superjail!”
The door opened and Alice stepped in, “Hey Dorks, what’s going on?”
“Oh nothing, just discussing another one of Jared’s STOOOOOOOOPID ideas.” he picked up a pencil and threw it at Jared’s head.
“B-but sir-“ He picked up the pencil and placed it on the desk. “Our goal is to keep Inmates out of Superjail! Jail is meant to rehabilitate the aggressive and harmful humans of the world and-“
“UGHHHH JARED, I DON’T CARE. JUST TELL ME WHEN THE POOL IS DONE.”
Jared growled and climbed up onto the desk, kicking everything off, and stomping on The Warden’s hand.
“OW, WHAT THE HELL JARED?!” he rubbed his hand, trying to take the pain away “GET BACK TO WO-“
Jared slapped The Warden and kicked him in the gut, “I QUIT!” He hopped off of the desk and pushed Alice, “Get out of my way, bitch.” walking out of the office and down the hallway.
“*gasp* Jared! Get back in here! You can’t quit! You work for ME!”
“NOT ANYMORE!”
He walked down the hall, watching all the inmates harassing him from the cells, catcalls and all. Jean and Paul peeked out of their cells and tapped Jared’s shoulder “Where are you going Hon?”
“I’M OUT OF HERE, I’VE HAD ENOUGH OF THIS BULLSHIT!”
Paul gave him a compassionate look and spoke quickly but quietly “Get out of here fast, Jared, make your life something great and never come back!”  Jean patted his back and shoved him off on his way out the door, “YOU’RE FREE BUDDY!”
Paul hugged Jean and rested his head on his shoulder “They grow up so fast.”

 “Pfft, who cares? He’s probably going to his stupid “tip” or something to cool off or something, he’ll be back, he always crawls back” The Warden sat at his desk, feet up and arms back.
Alice leaned on the desk, “Yeah, who needs him anyways? Jailbot, The Doctor, and I take care of Superjail just fine without that little twat.”
The Warden crossed his arms “Yeah, whatever. Get back to work, we’ll show him, we don’t need ‘em!”
The ‘Bot and Alice had left the room quickly, slamming the door behind them.
The Warden looking at an awkward picture of Jared on his desk, “Yeah right” he mocked Jared with a high pitched cracking voice that oddly enough sounded like Jared “Uhhh duhhh, I QUIT.” He shook his head and laughed.
Alice poked her head through the door once again, “Uhhh, we have a problem.”

“Oh, Jared, what a pleasant surprise!”
“Hello Charice! May I come in?”
“Yes of course!” The short woman led him into the pink building, holding his hand and smiling.
The Mistress stepped in front of her and raised an eyebrow, “What the hell do you think you’re doing Charice? Bringing that disgusting thing in my Ultraprison!?” she pointed at Jared “Don’t you work for that… uhh, what’s his face, The Warden, at the Superjail?”
Jared looked down and held his hands behind his back, “Yes ma’am I did,” He gritted his teeth and made his hands fists, “But then I quit. I hate it there!”
She put her hands on her hips “Well well well… then I think you’ll fit in JUST FINE here at Ultraprison!” She turned around and signaled the two short lovers over, “Would you like a tour, Jared?”
“Yes, of course!”

 “JESUS CHRIST YOU STUPID FUCKS CAN’T DO ANYTHING RIGHT!” The Warden trudged through a crowd of prisoners gazing at the failure of a pool, the tiles pointing upwards, pipes everywhere and muddy water in a huge asymmetrical square. “WHAT IS THIS BULLSHIT?!”
Alice stared down at some loose tiles and kicked them off “Well, we didn’t hire anyone to build it, so we tried to do it ourselves.”
The Warden crossed his arms “WHERE IS JARED? HE NEEDS TO GET SOMEBODY ON THIS RIGHT AWAY!”
Alice put a hand on her hip “He quit, remember?”
His eyes widened, “Oh... right...” he put a finger on his lips, signifying a thought process. “We need to find a replacement! Yes! Jared tryouts!”
Alice placed her nightstick in her other hand and walked off “whatever.”
The Warden crossed his arms and smiled “We’ll be just fine.”