Generation X

9. It's A Date

^ warning : the following content deals with the sensitive subject of anxiety and is not advised for immature or struggling audiences. please proceed with caution. DISCLAIMER: i am no expert on the subject and my intention is to interpret the serious issue as realistically as possible and do not wish to offend anyone who struggles with this serious matter and do not wish to misinterpret anything. if anything is offensive or inaccurate , please correct me so that the mistake can be addressed. again, proceed with caution and thank you ^

✨ James's POV ✨

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"Wow man, I didn't even know you liked her." Will says and Ben grins.

"How could I not? I'm not blind, she's super attractive." Ben states, and I stay quiet.

Truthfully, I had stayed quiet the entire time since Ben told us that he had asked out Kat and that she had said yes. He had texted me and Will, saying he had some good news he wanted to share with us and to meet him in the cafeteria after 2nd period.

"You've barely even talked to her, how do you know if you guys even have anything in common?" I decided.

"Well, how could he with Liz's tongue down his throat? Good for you man, finally getting to explore your options." Will defends.

"I'm excited. Kat is definitely way out of my league but look at me! I still can't believe she gave me a chance." Ben gushed.

"And you had the audacity to say I was whipped," I pretended to joke. I turned around and held the railings, trying to distract myself from the feelings of jealousy.

I had no right to be jealous, me and Kat were just friends. I had wanted to be more but it was very obvious that she didn't want that. By accepting Ben's date, that was the clearest sign she could've given me.

"I am gonna need some help. James, you read all those romantic books, help a brother out." Ben pleads and I bite my lip.

"I dunno, man. I might be busy." I say and my two friends turn to look at me.

"And what on earth would you be busy with, James?" Will questioned, raising his eyebrow at me.

"Well, William, if you must know. I've decided to ask Lola out again." I say and as soon as I say it, I immediately regret it. But, I couldn't take it back, it was already out there.

"Look at you! Taking my advice for once. Good for you." Ben swings his arm around my shoulders and pulls me down to ruffle my hair.

"Hey! Watch the merchandise!" I exclaimed and lightly pushed him away, reaching up to fix my hair. The two boys he's spent most of his childhood with shook their heads at him and the bell rang, signaling that they were going to be late for their 3rd period.

"I'll catch up with you guys later, I gotta head to class." I tell them and we part ways.

I shake my head, still not believing that I had told them I was going to ask Lola out again. I could barely do it the first time, I had no idea how I would pull it off this time.

My heart began to race, causing pain to my chest and my palms starting to become sweaty. I felt like I couldn't breathe and my mouth felt dry, and I quickly looked around, rushing to the nearest water fountain. I began to slowly take sips of water, forcing it to go down. It felt like there was a huge lump in my throat, prohibiting me from swallowing but after a few moments, it finally started growing smaller and going away, until it was gone.

My breathing became shallow and I looked around, trying to find somewhere private and out of the public eye.

I spotted the boys locker room, typically empty by now since all the guys were in the gym.