Unnecessary Words

Breakdown

I shut and locked the door. I was finally alone. Getting away from the others had posed to be a lot harder then I'd expected. I turned my back to the door and slid down until I was curled up in a ball. I didn't understand why people could be so cruel.

"Everyone feels that way, you don't have anxiety."

"It's just hair, It's not that important."

"You're so lazy. You don't ever help."

I didn't mean to but I started crying. IT was the first time crying out loud. Living alone had some perks. If I cried out loud no one would hear.

The words others had said bit into me, taking over my thoughts. Others actions, careless, hurtful. I knew it was stupid, crying about my inconvinence when others had it so much worse. I didn't understand why I didn't stop, but it seemed like I couldn't.

I sobbed harder. My throat hurt. My head was spinning. My breath came in gasps. Words cut like razors at my mind. I felt a hole rip in my heart. Crying out loud had a much bigger effect then silent crying. I felt torn. Ripped apart by unforgiving people. Friends, family and strangers alike. No one knew. I wouldn't tell anyone.

"Shyla are you okay?"

I choked. That sounded like Xander.I bit my hand and tried to stop crying.It didn't work very well. I sucked in a breath that sounded louder and more shrill than I had meant for.

"Shyla?" I heard his feet outside my bedroom door. He tried twisting the knob but it would turn. "Shyla!" He was getting more persistent.

"I'm okay." My voice made the lie obvious.

"Can I come in?"

"No!" I didn't want him to see me like this. To see me broken.

"Shyla please." He sounded hurt and a little sad himself.

I couldn't hold back the sobs any longer. They broke free with an ugly force that left me drained of air. I gasped and bit my lip to try and stop it but it came out as a moan.

I heard a quiet gasp on the other side of the door. Heartbroken. Why was he worried about me. Why was he here?

"Xander why are you here?" I managed to choke out.

"You left something at Emma's house but that doesn't matter."

My head was spinning unbearably fast. It hurt. I hadn't realized how hard I was gasping.

"Shyla?"

His voice was alarmingly far and fuzzy.

My body gave out and I felt to the side and lost consciousness.