Rhythm to My Chaos

Chapter 4

#NewClassicRTMC

Chapter 4
Someone

The atmosphere seemed to grow awkward and uncomfortable once Ike left me with Gian. Tahimik kaming dalawa at ni isa sa amin ay walang nagsalita sa loob ng halos isang minuto.

"Magkakilala kayong dalawa?" Si Gian ang bumasag sa katahimikan na 'yon nang magpakawala siya ng tanong. Nag-angat ako ng tingin sa kanya. He was looking at me suspiciously. "Ano ang pinag-usapan ninyo habang wala ako?"

As I didn't want to talk about it yet, I shook my head to answer both of his questions. "Wala lang 'yon. Babalik ka na ba sa resort? Magpapahinga lang ako sa kuwarto."

I saw how Gian strained himself not to pry more. He knew exactly when I don't want to talk about something. Kapag pinilit niya ay alam niyang mas lalo ko lang siyang hindi papansinin at kakausapin. Wala siyang nagawa kung hindi ang umalis na lamang para bumalik sa trabaho.

Without ado, I went inside my room. Pinakiramdaman kong muli ang pagtibok ng aking puso. It was still beating fast like it had no thoughts of slowing down.

I couldn't blame it though. There was a rush of both excitement and fear running through my veins. I could feel it in me. My mind wasn't functioning properly as well. I couldn't think straight. It was impossible for me to relax and calm down.

I kept looking back on how Ike spoke with me, not just through his lips but also through the determination igniting in his eyes. It was thrilling yet unnerving.

The moment I found him telling the truth, I knew I should be jumping in joy. The hopeful old me would've agreed right away. But since I had changed, I had a different reaction. I couldn't give him an answer. I was hesitating a lot. I kept questioning myself inside my head.

I had been rejected by a number of recording companies or record labels. I acknowledged that I wasn't good enough to be signed. But I took that risk, thinking that it was my last chance. It was the last time I was going to chase my dreams―and I failed. It was just like what I expected.

Even with my hopes up on the sky, at the back of my mind, I knew it would only fall back down. There was an invisible chain tied on my feet to the ground. I would never be able to go any higher.

Yes, I got hurt but to be honest, I orchestrated that fall. I treated that huge fall as a sign. I knew inside me that it was only a fraud but I still took the risk. I used it as an excuse to stop working towards my goal because I had a feeling that I wouldn't succeed no matter what. I needed a reason to convince myself that I already had enough and it was time to stop.

However, I didn't see this coming. Ike's arrival was an unforeseen event in my life. Hindi ako makapaniwala sa oportunidad na ibinibigay niya sa akin. Just when I finally convinced myself to stop, he opened up a new path for me to take. A path that's more reliable. A path that could actually lead me to my goal. He said that he was willing to guide me.

But the biggest question that still remained and left unanswered: Why?

If those record companies rejected me, why would he choose me? Why would he want to gamble with someone like me who has a questionable talent?

Pinilit kong isinantabi ang mga katanungang gumugulo sa aking isipan. I tried to act unaffected for the rest of the day until I arrived at the resort.

Ike caught my attention right away. It wasn't hard for me to spot him even if he was sitting alone at the corner. He didn't notice my arrival though. He was busy eating a pasta dish.

Bahagya akong napanguso. I didn't want to assume but I felt like he came to eat at the restaurant for me. He could have his food delivered to his villa as one of the resort's service. However, he chose to come and eat here.