Reckless (A Beau Brooks Fanfiction)

Chapter 1

    *hi guys! it's been a while but here it is, the first chapter of Reckless!! i dont think i could thank you all for all the feedback and support i've gotten on Crush, like right now, that story is my most proud accomplishment and im so happy so many of you loved it, as much as i loved writing it. thank you all so much. ily *

      Two years.

      It's been two years since I left Melbourne and moved back to California. Two years since I've left Beau, or seen him. And in those two years, things have changed. The things I was afraid of have happened, we grew apart.

      The first few months apart from each other were unbearable. After I left everyone at the airport, I can't even explain how much I cried. We got to LA and immediately drove to our new house, but everything was a blur to me. Our house was large and perfect, clearly my mother must of chosen where we lived this time. We lived uphill, sort of looking over LA. It was a very beautiful place, but it was too fancy for my liking. I perfered the smaller house back in Melbourne.

     The first thing I did when I had finally set up my room to my liking, was set up Skype on my laptop. And so I called Beau, my webcam ready to capture our faces so we could see each other again. The first time I called him, there was no answer. I still remember how crushed I was, my heart had dropped. I sat there staring at the screen, what if he didn't want to talk to me?

     But I heard the noise of a call start up on my screen and I frantically answered it, trying to make myself look decent.

      His face popped up on my screen and I almost bursted out crying. But I held myself together and smiled brightly. "Hey beautiful. " He had said.

     We talked as if we never left each other and I took in every moment of it.

      We talked for hours everyday for months. And then we fell apart. We both became busy, he had to work on videos for his new group on YouTube that was becoming successful. Everytime we would talk, he would be so proud of himself and I was so happy for him. I was busy with school, trying to get my grades up. So eventually, the calls decreased to about once every few weeks. We ran out of things to say online, if he was here with me, it'd be different and we'd still be close as ever.

      There were times I've called and either Luke or Jai would answer and tell me Beau was out and couldn't talk that night. It was happening more frequently as the months went by, so I gave up trying. I tried backing off of him and leaving him alone, but I missed him so much that all I could do was cry. I knew when I left we'd grow apart and now that it's happening, I don't know what to do with myself.

      My sadness eventually turned to anger, he's the one who promised me he'd never let me go, but does he realize what's happening?

      After the calls stopped all together,   I told myself to move on . It was no use in trying since we were so far away from each other and he didn't seem to make an effort anymore to speak to me.

      I met up with my new friends and old ones and we all went out. I got closer to them and they became my source of happiness. I told myself back in Melbourne that I hoped I wouldn't change when I got back, but I'm scared to admit that I have. I go out everyday, I go to clubs, I drink and I party. I'm becoming more reckless and doing things I never would of done before. But these things only started happening when Beau gave up on trying with me. The only person I still keep in touch with is Lexy and she gives me updates on everything, I know I can count on her if Beau does anything I should know of.

      I don't want to change, but it feels like a release when I go out, like I can do anything. I gave up on my grades, I don't care about that anymore. I don't care if my parents don't like it, they can't make me stay the same way forever.

      I can't deny that I've changed.

      And  I can't deny that I miss Beau, I always push away the thought of him when it comes up cause it hurts too much to think of what we used to have together. I mean, what did I expect? It wasn't going to work out anyways being so distant.

      I just can't believe it's all gone.

      And I think back, I made a promise that I'd never forget him and he did the same.

      And, god, I know I'll never forget him.

      I'm just scared he's forgotten me, and moved onto another girl.

      But I can't blame him if he has because recently, I've been getting closer to my ex boyfriend from before I left to Melbourne and met Beau. Everytime we go out, he's been there. I told him all about Melbourne and Beau and he's been there for me.

      It kills me to think back when Beau said he'd always be there for me. I feel like I'm doing a bad thing trying to get over Beau with a new guy...I feel guilty. But if Beau reall still loved me, wouldn't he do everything in his power to talk to me?

      I miss him with everything...but all I can do is move on. There's nothing else I can do.

*Hope you all enjoyed the first chapter! so glad to be starting a new story, i hope you all are as excited as I am!! feedback would be appreciated, let me know your thoughts on the chapter! *