A second chance // Banana fish ff

Two ♡

*Ash's pov*

I fell wetness soaking in through my shirt and dripping onto the street concrete. To my side, a newly wounded Lao, smiling as took in three deep breaths. Eiji! He was the only one on my mind at that moment. I looked down and saw the two pieces of paper I treasured the most covered in splotches of blood. No, no this can't end like this-I have to get to him. I have to see him one more time.

""Dammit you missed my vital points" I said, turning to my side again. I smirked, but deep down I knew there was no point in seeking help even if I wasn't going to die immediately. The wound was too fatal and death was inescapable. Lao let out an eerie laugh that sent chills down my spine for the first time in a while-"Same goes to you... and both of us can't be saved" he sneered, falling to his knees against the brick wall.

I couldn't let him know I was thinking the same thing and let out a chuckle- "Maybe for you, but I know I'll survive. I'm not weak like your bitchass- hope your final moments are spent in dread against this brick wall, unlike you, I have people waiting to see me- even Sing, though I can't say the same for you" I said limping towards the only place I felt happy and safe. I could feel his glare piercing the back of my head but refused to turn around.

I kept one hand on my lower abdomen, the other holding the most precious and valuable item I own. I smiled as I thought about his dumb grin and goofy accent when he spoke in english. He was by no means fluent, but seeing him make such an effort to communicate with me, made me feel warm- a feeling I was not used to.

His dark brown eyes were mesmerizing to look at. They felt accepting and kind. Despite him having no clue about American culture, he always tried his best to accommodate to my taste in food and even learned a couple new words a day. My favourite thing ever, was when he would read the morning newspaper, and I would catch him getting excited when he understood what they were talking about without my help. I wish I had learned more japanese to help with communication, but my selfish needs constantly took over.

I felt tears swelling up in the bottom planes of my eyes, thinking about the one who was always truly there for me without expecting anything in return. Eiji, the one who laughed at my pumpkin phobia, the one who can't aim for shit, yet risked his life to save me from Dino at the celebration dinner. Alex, Bones, Kong, Cain and everyone else, the ones who relied on me, saw me as an authority figure, I swore I would protect them, yet look at the mess I'm in- I cant even protect myself. The one parental figure I felt close to, Max who without him, I would never have uncovered all this madness and fuckery. Sigh.

Just a little closer till I'm there.

Before I knew it, I was at the foot of the stairs leading to the New York Public Library. I smiled to myself, seeing couples sitting on the ledge of the stairs talking, groups of friends engaging in laughter and bright conversation with each other. I shuffled my way inside, through the wide, dark doors. The inside of the library was simply breathtaking. The long rows of bookshelves on either side of the room, the low hanging chandeliers, the rows of tables with surprisingly not many people, and the best part of it all- the silence. Something I never got at Dino's or frankly anywhere. I loved coming here when my head was full just to clear it out and read.

I had a faint flashback to the first time he found me here, we had that explosive fights where I admitted to him about all my killings and how I felt about myself. The second he stepped foot into the library, I felt his presence but chose to say nothing. The first words he uttered-"You knew I was here. Don't pretend you didn't," He said in his usual cheerful and chirpy voice. I even remember giving him the usual cold shoulder as a joke. I chuckled under my breath.

He apologized for that night, when it should have been me instead. I got out of line and took my anger out on him. Fucking idiot. He believed in me no matter what, and that meant the world to me. I was grateful to see him in front of me, even if we had exchanged a few harsh words the night before. I was satisfied and happy knowing I introduced him to this place.

The atmosphere was blissful and calm. My heart felt content when I came here, especially after introducing my favourite place to my favourite person. I make my way to my usual table in the Rose Main Reading Room, sitting down in the seat opposite of my own, trying to feel the warmth of Eiji's presence. I place the two page letter on the table and take a deep breath, and continue reading the last few sentences I had left.

You're not alone. I'm by your side.

My soul is always with you.

— Eiji Okumura

I couldn't hold in my tears any longer. My eyes became blurry, I didn't know if it was from the tears or losing consciousness- either way I let it happen. I could rest easy knowing the one who was always by my side, who loved me for who I was despite my many flaws and who made me laugh everyday was safe. I felt horrible for not getting in a last goodbye, but maybe it was for the best, I wouldn't want him seeing me like this anyways- not that he would judge me.

I closed my eyes and took in a few deep breaths, for the first time, putting both hands on the table, holding firmly onto the letter with one. My left hand felt cold and wet. I felt like I was slipping into a dream, everything felt and looked bright yet calming and peaceful. My ears started ringing and I could no longer hear the voices around me. With all of my energy, I took my final breaths and said my goodbyes-"Thank you everyone, we shall meet again". I let out a weak smile as my thoughts went blank and I could no longer feel my chest rising up and down.