Chapter 3: Changing Your Attitude

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"Beauty is not in the face; beauty is a light in the heart"- Kahlil Gibran

This chapter is not only about positivity, but it's also to help you change your view on beauty. How could you love yourself, love your beauty, if you judge how others look, or if you don't accept their appearance? Most of us have done it.

Have you ever done this? You were scrolling through Netflix searching for a romance movie, and you find a plot intriguing so you think about watching it. Then you look at the cast and realize the main lead is not handsome/pretty. Therefore you lose interest in watching the movie. This may not apply to all of you, but some I know. Why? Because I witnessed it myself. Even I used to do this a million times. We judge the actors for pursuing their dream with their appearance. Of course, we know that some actors acting can 'wow' us and we forget about their appearance, but not everyone can have the 'wow' factor.

I want you to think about this question: Would you rather have a hot actor/actress with horrible acting or an actor whose appearance doesn't fit society's standards with amazing acting in a romance movie?

We often judge others by their looks to make us feel better or worse. If your crush has gotten into a relationship, would you judge their partner's looks and compare it to yours? Or would you compare your looks with heirs to make you feel even worse, thinking they look better than me anyways? Are you so insecure, you need to constantly compare yourselves to other women or men to make yourself better? Or do you want to feel the pain of not being 'beautiful' by comparing others with you?

When you judge others, you might be indirectly be bullying them. You think they might know your opinion about them, but trust me, they will know, and they will beat themselves up about it. Unless they are strong people and have read my book then they should be fine.

Why do you always need reassurance that you are beautiful? Why do you want to make yourself feel worse?

Start anew. Don't rate how others look. Don't search for compliments. Understand who you are. See what makes your soul beautiful. Don't call someone beautiful as soon as you meet someone. However, that doesn't mean you can't love the depth of their eyes or their smile. Everyone is beautiful physically and inside. But even calling someone beautiful takes time? Why? Because you need to know who they are. However, even if you find someone ugly after knowing them, please understand that they may be ugly to you, but beautiful to others. Even Hitler had people who found him beautiful while the rest of the world hates them. Some may feel sympathy for the serial killers we read about, why? Because most of them had a rough and scarring childhood, and mental issues, but we still do not accept what they did. If you did then you are a psychopath!

Don't be negative, that's unhealthy. Good things come towards positive humans, even after hardship.

If you believe in God, why would he/she create ugly beings? After all, we are their children, why would they want us to be ugly?

If you end up loving someone, they tend to become more attractive to your eyes. 

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