Endings, beginnings

Chapter twelve

Guess who made a new fren today 🥺🥺
At least until they realize what a massive piece of shit I am and move on to bigger and better things, important stuff and people actually worth their time like everyone else has lmaoooo ✌🏽🥰👌🏽
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"When I told you to remind me that I'm the best more often, is this what you thought of? Allow me to clarify- I meant that as permission to flatter me, not bribing material for whenever you feel like getting us both killed."

If looks could kill, Kingsley would be in an even worse condition than he already was.
That thought didn't sit well with Jace as he pressed a towel hard against a jagged cut on the kids leg.

"You're sure this is the only place you got scratched?"
The sharpness in his own tone caught him off guard but damn this, the kid deserved it.

"Since that's the only place I'm sore and bleeding I'm pretty sure, Jay."
King was white faced and shaky from the pain but he was smiling that stupidly angelic smile anyways.
Normally his smile made Jace's heart race but right now he was too pissed at the kid to give in.

"You're a comedian now, huh?
What, nearly getting yourself killed - again- give you an endless supply of jokes?"

"Something like that," King said gently. "Besides, it wasn't that close Jay.
I knew what I was doing."

"That vengeful spirit doesn't care if you know what you're fucking doing, King!
What if I hadn't been there to torch the bitch?"

"You were, Jay.
Just like I knew you would be.
You're always there for me when I need you, ever since the first day we met.
Do you remember that?"

Jace could describe almost every moment he'd spent with King in minute detail - especially their first meeting, the day his life changed for the better- but he cocked an eyebrow as though unsure.
"Vaguely?"

"Well, it's a long sappy story.
I'll spare you most of it," King broke off and grimaced as Jace began to bandage the wound snugly.

"Anyways, I told you I was tired of being scared."

"I'm always scared, Jay.
Ever since I can remember but when mom went away- it's hard to breath sometimes.
I'm just- I'm tired of being scared."
King's voice had been a little gentler then, without the slight rasp from a few years of illegal drugs or the deeper tone he'd developed over the years.

But Jace had known then and he knew now- if he ever met any of the bastards responsible for hurting this literal angel, he'd kill them without a second thought.

"Yeah I - I actually do remember that."
Jace prayed the kid wouldn't catch how utterly fake his nonchalance was.

"Well, uhm-"
Kingsley lay a hand on his friend's shoulder. For the briefest instant Jace froze.
He couldn't breathe.

King's small hand felt so impossibly right on his own broad shoulder that he was half convinced this was another happy dream.

"I just wanted to- I need to tell you, Jace.
I'm not afraid anymore.
Not of hunting, not of living on the run- not of living, period.
And that's all because of you.
You're the best thing that's ever happened to me and I just- I want you to know how important you are to me, okay?
I can't imagine life without you because Jay, you're the one who taught me what life really means."

The passionate words hung in the air for several long, dreadful seconds.
Everything in Jace was screaming to tell King everything.
The truth.
Explain that he had it all backwards, how Jace was the one who couldn't imagine life without him.
How King was the one who'd saved Jace's life.
How he really felt.

It would be so easy.
King was already feeling it too, or at least on the verge of feeling it.
All it would take was a little eye contact, leaning a few inches closer.
King was ready to offer himself.
To risk himself and his heart.
Jace had dated enough girls to see that in his friend's eyes.

For a heartbeat he smiled at the kid, willing himself to do the right thing.
King was so innocent, so pure.
The light in his eyes was almost overwhelming.

Jace knew he was going to break him.
Twist him into something other than this sweet kid silently begging for a response.
The sooner King was safe from him, the better. That's why Jace had to do this.
Even though it was killing him.

"Thanks kid."
The utterly crushed expression that replaced King's hopeful smile felt like a dagger to the chest.
Good.
Jace deserved all the pain in this stupid fucking world.
Smiling easily, he shrugged King's hand from his shoulder and stood up.

"That got a little intense but you're right.
Like I told you, I'm the best.
You're lucky I even put up with you," the teasing lilt in his tone was like acid in his throat.
If only he could tell King-

"Yeah- yeah, I really am. I uh- I" the kid swiped his face in a miserable attempt to hide his tears.
Jace resisted the urge to throw his arms around those slender shoulders and kiss him.

"I'm actually not feeling so great.
D'you mind if I lay down for awhile?"
His voice shook but to his credit most people would've taken that as further confirmation that he was telling the truth.

"I told you bro, that was a stupid play.
Next time we're facing a vengeful spirit I make the calls.
I might end up having better things to do than saving your stupid ass and I don't want you getting dead on my watch."
Jace pretended not to hear the younger boys fiercely stifled crying from under his blankets. Impulsively he grabbed the car keys.

"I'm heading out for awhile okay?
You rest up kid."
"Sure thing," came the muffled reply.

His hand on the door, Jace hesitated.
"King?"
"Mm-hmm?"

"You're my best friend too.
There's nothing I wouldn't do for you.
You know that, right?"

"Yeah Jay, I uh- I know.
Thanks."
It wasn't until the door was firmly closed behind him that Jace finally gave in and let the tears come.