Milo & Judah

Chapter 10 - Revealing Conversations in the Dark

Milo had forgotten how fun and satisfying it could be to just make out with someone you liked for an extended period without the expectation of doing more. The lights on the dash had long since gone out, so he couldn't be sure of the time. It simultaneously felt like it had been twenty minutes or two hours.

It wasn't until Judah's phone interrupted them that reality set in. They couldn't stay in the backseat forever.

Reality hit even harder when Judah picked up his phone and turned it so Milo could see his brother's name on the screen.

Despite Milo's annoyance that this was probably the end of their excursion, he couldn't help but smile at the next words out of Judah's mouth that proved how alike they thought.

Judah sang: "Back to life. Back to reality."

He was a bit off-key. It was nice to know he wasn't good at everything.

Judah pressed the button and held the phone to his ear. "What's up?"

The bright screen cast elongated shadows across half of Judah's face before the light extinguished, leaving Milo blinking against the darkness.

"Where the hell are you?" Mercer spoke loud enough that Milo could hear even without the speakerphone turned on. "I'm bored out of my friggin skull."

It wasn't like Mercer to use such tame language. Milo suspected their mother was within earshot, putting him on his best behavior.

"I'm exactly where I said I'd be." Judah sounded a bit irritated. He pulled the phone away from his mouth for a second to exhale a sharp gust of air. The screen lit up again.

"I hope you thought about what I said earlier." Mercer said.

Judah's eyes jumped to meet Milo's before the light went out again.

Milo wondered why. He was still curious about Judah and Mercer's conversation. Why had it upset Judah? And why did Mercer think he couldn't say whatever it was in front of Milo?

Unless—obviously—it was about Milo. Which he thought should've been clear from the first moment.

"Are you coming back anytime soon?" Mercer asked.

The phone lit up as Judah dipped it. He tapped the mute button. "Are we?"

"We probably should."

Judah groaned and unmuted the phone. "We're about to leave the party. We should be there soon."

"Fine."

Mercer hung up without saying goodbye. The phone lit the interior of the car in a dim blue glow. Judah leaned over to Milo as the light went out again. He kissed Milo for a long moment before pulling away.

In the dark, Judah whispered, "I had a great time tonight."

"I did, too."

"I wish it didn't have to end so soon."

Milo grinned at Judah saying "soon." Before the phone went dark, Milo noticed the time. It was nearly eleven o'clock. They left his house almost three hours ago. Only about thirty minutes of that time had been at Hunter's party. Taking into account their drive time, and the stop at the grocery store to talk, they'd been kissing for over an hour.

But Milo knew exactly what Judah meant. Milo probably would have gone double that if they had the time.

After getting back into the front seats, Milo once again asked about Judah's talk with Mercer. He already suspected the answer, but he wanted to know.

"Your brother was just worried about you." Judah said. "He thought I was leading you on by calling this a date. I sorta implied that it was one, and he got confused."

"He doesn't know you like guys, too?"

"That's not something I tell most people, because honestly I don't seek out guys to date."

"Have you ever dated a guy?" Milo asked, trying to keep his voice light and blasé. He wanted to know without being too pushy.

Judah laughed. It wasn't an amused sort of laugh. More a startled chuckle. "No."

"Have you ever done anything with a guy before me?"

"Yes." Judah said. He stayed quiet for a minute, and Milo thought he was done, but then he added, "There have been a couple since I got to college. But those were just like one-offs when I'd meet a guy I was really into, and I could tell he liked me too.

"And there was this one guy back in high school. We were on the swim team together. We messed around sometimes. It just kinda happened with him. Although he was very adamant that he wasn't into dudes. What we did was just 'a way to let off steam,' he claimed. Last I heard, he knocked up some girl back home and married her."

"Well, no worries here. I'm solely into guys." Milo said.

Judah took Milo's free hand off the center console. He slipped his fingers between Milo's and gave his hand a small squeeze. He sounded a bit tentative when he asked, "Does it bother you that I'm not?"

"Why would it?"

"It matters to some people." Judah sounded downcast.

Milo suspected there was a story behind that, but he didn't press. "Well, fuck them. Those people are idiots."

The laugh that escaped Judah sounded so sweet and genuine. "You're awesome. You know that?"

Milo considered making a joke, like saying, "I know." But he didn't have the self-assurance to be that audacious.

Judah lifted their clasped hands and kissed Milo's knuckles.

Milo felt he needed to say something in his brother's defense. Mercer had always been very supportive of Milo. "Mercer isn't one of those people, y'know. He'd never treat you differently because you're into guys."

"Even if the guy I'm into is his brother?"

Milo's breath stuttered. It was one thing to know that. Judah had made his feelings very clear with the intensity he'd displayed while kissing Milo. But to hear Judah say it out loud sent Milo on a whole other emotional journey.

Milo stuttered, "I mean, that might take him a minute to adjust to. But I'm sure he'd come around before too long."

Judah took a deep breath. "Okay. I'll talk to him."