Under the Lights

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It's finally starting to get cooler here. You don't really like the cold all that much, but you do love the crisp breeze that marks the start of December. Where it's chilly enough for the bugs and mosquitos to have gone away, but not too cold to enjoy the weather.

You had already put your christmas lights up early and finally got a new wreath with multi-colored lights to put up above your garage, replacing the older white lighted one that clashed with the rest of your multi-colored decorations. It's already dark outside, but you decide to ask your friend that's over for the weekend to help you place it.

Now, after having set it up, you and Wilbur stand in your driveway looking at the decorations that are now completed and matching.

"It's really nice out here tonight," Wilbur says glancing up at the sky above your heads. You can still see the stars like normal despite more and more people in your neighborhood putting up their christmas lights in the past weeks.

"Yeah, I never get to hang out out here much cause it's either too buggy or too cold," you respond, shifting your bare feet on the cool concrete beneath you.

You never get to see the stars all that much either, being out at night is pretty rare for you, and you find that you can barely take your eyes off of them. After a minute, you do, walking back into the garage and towards the door that leads inside.

Wilbur follows you, but makes a confused noise when you turn the garage light off and head back out to the driveway.

"What are you doing?" he asks, tilting his head as he speaks.

"I'm gonna watch the stars for a while, you can go back inside if you want," you say while lying down on the ground, facing the quiet, dark road at the end of your driveway.

However a few seconds later, you hear Wilbur laying down beside you. Neither of you say anything, relaxing in comfortable silence as you both stare up at the twinkling heavens.

It feels amazing. Tranquil. Like there's absolutely nothing you have to worry about except lie there and look at the stars. And be with each other. You were delighted when Wilbur agreed to come to your place for the weekend. You both rarely get to see much of each other, and this is probably one of the best ways possible to spend quality time with the person you love most. It's perfect.

A few minutes pass, and you see Wilbur shift awkwardly out of the corner of your eye.

You suddenly feel nervous, wondering if it's too cold out here to be sitting outside on the concrete driveway.

"Are you uncomfortable? We can go inside if it's too chilly," you say with a small amount of concern lacing your voice.

"What? No! It's really nice out here, it's just..." He trails off. Wilbur turns his head to meet your gaze, and speaks again.

"Can I hold your hand?"

You glance down at where Wilbur's hand rests on his stomach. Silently, you take his hand into your own, both of your fingertips a little cold from the cool breeze drifting through the night. Without prompting, you scoot a little closer to Wilbur, and you can tell he wanted it too when he does the same, until your shoulders are brushing against each other.

And you stay like that. For minutes, hours, neither of you could care because there's absolutely nothing else that matters in the world right now besides the stars and the lights and all the points of contact you and Wilbur share, skin brushing against skin, and you feel more calm than you have in a very long time. Like you've been restless for ages, and now as you lay in your driveway with your favorite person, your soul is settling back into your body, it feels right. You have someone by your side, and he's here to stay.

You stare at the stars long enough that you can almost see the imaginary lines that connect them due to the christmas lights hanging from your gutter reflecting in your vision. You're starting to get tired, but can't bring yourself to close your eyes, not even for a second. Savoring this moment is all you want.

Slowly, you turn to look at Wilbur. He doesn't seem to notice, probably as enraptured at the view as you were just moments ago. But now you're enraptured by a different view. You feel your lips curling into a smile, painting a mental image of the sight before you; the most important person in your life right next to you, face illuminated by the multi-colored lights, the moonlight, the starlight, all of it. If you had been any more tired, you would've thought that the glow was coming from within him, this molten ball of warmth and unconditional love, sitting out in your cold driveway in the middle of the night just because you wanted to stargaze.

The unconditional love part dawns on you slowly, like a wave of relief washing over you. Whenever you would read about that kind of love and positive regard, you couldn't help but get a little sad at the thought that you didn't have that yourself. But suddenly, you realize you do. It's embedded in the way Wilbur always helps you out, comforts you, lets you help him, no matter what. It's buried in the way he came over to your town this weekend, knowing that you hate being alone during all this cold weather and the holiday season. It's shining in the way Wilbur is here, holding your hand, sharing this moment with you, taking it all in. You've never felt a stronger connection with another person than the one you have with Wilbur, knowing that it's unbreakable, that he won't leave you, that he won't just come and go without warning or any regard to your feelings like everyone else in your life seems to.

In your thoughts, in Wilbur's arms, you feel grounded for once in your life. Like everything has settled into the right place. No more desperately jamming the pieces together scrambling to make a picture to try and find some meaning to be able to keep a hold on yourself. Wilbur is your tether. And you're here, in this moment, and it's perfect. 

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