Is it worth it? {a Tommyinit fanfiction DISCONTINUED}

Talk

{Edited}

Tommy's pov~

   I awkwardly looked away from Wilbur. I could feel his stare searing into my skull even looking away it was still painfully awkward. I could understand Wilbur's actions, he wasn't used to me not having confidence every 24\7. I sigh and look at him our eyes connecting " what?" I asked with annoyance clear in my voice "you don't seem like your usual self" Wilbur told me I scoffed trying to avoid the statement as much as I can "I don't know what you're talking about.." I responded the nervousness clear in my voice.

   why doesn't he just give up? does he think I'm some pussy? is he onto me? my thoughts were interrupted by the placing of cups "Wilbur, leave him alone." Colby said the enormity clear in his voice, when Colby meant something they could be terrifying or super friendly and genuine. I quickly got up putting my right hand around the can of soda feeling the coldness radiating off it I opened it taking a sip of the familiar beverage. 

  I smiled looking at Colby "thanks" I say taking another sip from the drink, although why does Colby even have coke? I thought they hated it. " Tommyinnit saying thank you? I think I'm dreaming!" Wilbur laughed at his own statement " oh fuck off!" I respond chuckling at his statement cause it was partly true when other people that I knew were around I would almost never say sorry but when it was a stranger or someone working somewhere I would thank them.

   I saw Colby sitting in the middle of the couch just between me and Wilbur "so, what's bothering you?" Colby asked me glancing at me every so often after taking a sip of his hot cocoa. "nothing." I answered as quickly as possible while looking away and scrunching my legs into my chest as if my life depended on it.

   I didn't want to even think about the situation with Tubbo, knowing I had to go back home to that. Tubbo would probably ask a million questions. "come on Tommy, I know somethings wrong." Colby said with worry, I looked up hesitantly to see a knowing look with a small smile. I look at Colby with a sad expression before quickly putting on fake self-confidence and standing up suddenly earning a surprised gasp from Wilbur and crow staring at me like a curious bird.

   " something wrong with me? pfft, you've gotta be joking I have the most confidence than anyone you've ever met!" I shout a little louder than I was intending to, I've heard I can be pretty loud and annoying when people first met me which honestly I could understand id have to be the most annoying person I know too.

  

  "We weren't talking about your confidence Tommy" Wilbur was the one talking now. I tried my best to keep a smile on my face as I grabbed my cardigan putting it back on and looking at my phone for any excuse just to get out of this situation.

   It was so awkward in this room and uncomfortable, I didn't think I would be getting asked to confess my problems to people I wasn't even that close to and only just barely trusted.

   "oh wOuLd yOu lOoK aT tHe TiMe" I said all weirdly as I grabbed my soda and quickly started to walk to the front door of the apartment "wait! where are you going!?!?" I heard someone question me but I simply ignored them as I got to the door putting my hand around the doorknob and quickly pushing the door open running out of it. I put my phone in my pocket still running as fast as I can until I slowly come to a stop. I look back frantically to check if anyone's following me.

  

  "why'd I run...now they're probably worried you fuck up.." I mutter to myself as I look up at the sky and then the ground. I look in front of me as I slowly start walking again, that's it nothing particular just...walking it was nice really. I know I've said this a million times before but I enjoy walking it's just so relaxing.

   I look out into the road and just stare at it for awhile slowly coming to a stop standing in place. what if i...what if I walk in the middle of the street? would anyone even try to stop me? they'd probably just stare and look at me as if I was an idiot and didn't know what cars were, like the fucked up people they are. thing is, I would know exactly what I was doing.

   I'm so tempted to just walk in the middle of the street...see if a car would hit me, wait. shit, I shouldn't be thinking like this. I quickly look away from the street and start to slowly walk again. where was I headed? you might be asking, well there's a simple answer to that. I was heading to the park.

842 𝙬𝙤𝙧𝙙𝙨
𝙎𝙤𝙧𝙧𝙮 𝙞𝙩'𝙨 𝙨𝙤 𝙨𝙝𝙤𝙧𝙩 𝙩𝙤𝙙𝙖𝙮 𝙜𝙪𝙮𝙨 𝙄 𝙬𝙖𝙣𝙩𝙚𝙙 𝙩𝙤 𝙜𝙚𝙩 𝙨𝙤𝙢𝙚𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙤𝙪𝙩 𝙖𝙨 𝙦𝙪𝙞𝙘𝙠 𝙖𝙨 𝙥𝙤𝙨𝙨𝙞𝙗𝙡𝙚 𝙨𝙚𝙣𝙨𝙚 𝙄 𝙬𝙤𝙠𝙚 𝙪𝙥 𝙡𝙖𝙩𝙚 𝙩𝙤𝙙𝙖𝙮, 𝙤𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙧𝙬𝙞𝙨𝙚 𝙄 𝙬𝙤𝙪𝙡𝙙'𝙫𝙚 𝙜𝙤𝙩 𝙩𝙬𝙤 𝙘𝙝𝙖𝙥𝙩𝙚𝙧𝙨 𝙤𝙪𝙩. 𝙄'𝙢 𝙩𝙚𝙧𝙧𝙞𝙗𝙡𝙮 𝙨𝙤𝙧𝙧𝙮. 𝘽𝙪𝙩 𝙖𝙣𝙮𝙬𝙖𝙮𝙨 𝙝𝙖𝙫𝙚 𝙖 𝙜𝙤𝙤𝙙 𝙣𝙞𝙜𝙝𝙩/𝙙𝙖𝙮