You're So Short It's Funny

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I was in the mood for chocolate, the cupboard that contained all the delicious snacks were 1 million times my size, Tom made that the snacks cupboard on purpose!

I groaned out of pure irritation as I struggled to reach the cupboard of heaven. I heard a slight chuckle, as if the person behind me tried controlling himself.
I frowned and turned around, Tom stood there with crossed arms, enjoying the view.

My top got exposed every time I reached, and every time he'd cat call me when it did. Then, I hurled a spoon at him.

HE WASN'T HELPING!

He knows I hate it when he helps me with anything, so I refused to ask him.

"So you'd rather break your bones then just ask for my help?". He shook his head and clicked his tongue out of disappointment.

I rolled my eyes and head for the chair. Then, as fast as lightning, he sprinted to the chair and sat on it.

"Nope". This prick!

"TOM!!! I'M HUNGRYYYYY! I SWEAR I'LL MAKE CHOCOLATE OUTTA YA!" I threatened as I tugged at his tie.

"Hmm, white... Chocolate?" He asked with a smirk. I gave him a confused look, then... I understood what he meant.
He even waited until I got the 'joke'

"EWE TOM! I WANNA EAT NOW NOT THAT!" I huffed and stomped  out of the kitchen.

I'll get some other snacks it's fine!

"Darling! I got some chocolate with your name on iiiitt!! It's the last one and if you don't come now it'll be gone!!" my eyes grew and I ran to the kitchen like a mad man.

"Tom!!!" I yelled, literal tears were in my eyes, I JUST WANTED SOME CHOCOLATE.

He smiled then walked up to me, he wiped away my tears and put a block in my mouth, lips still quivering .

"I'll always help you, you're my everything and I'd do anything for you. It's not inconvenience, it's love". He caressed my cheek and I cried while eating the chocolate. I nodded and he kissed my forehead.

"You so short it's funny". He knew I'd get mad so he made a run for it.

THIS TWAT! (the British version)

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SORRY IT WAS SOOO SHHOORRRTTT!! But, I'm gonna admit this openly...
I HAVE AN UNHEALTHY OBSESSION WITH TOM HIDDLESTON :( Like, it's not even funny. If you think that's normal then yohre weird!

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