I walked into the hotel about 12 hours later, trying to stay quiet. It was a little difficult when my body felt like dead weight.
"Angel!" I jumped hearing Charlie call my name. I hadn't even heard her in the room.
"Fuckin'— babe, don't give me a heart attack like that. Ya gotta give me some kinda warnin' or some shit" I crossed my lower set of arms across my body, one of my upper hands on my chest trying to calm my nerves. I was quite on edge after all that Val had put me through.
"Sorry, it's just... You've been out for so long I was worried about you..." I gave her a smile
"I'm fine toots. Just worked an extra shift ya know? Sorry I couldn't make it to help with the redecoratin', but ya know, big Vee relies on me so~" I tried to shrug it off. I had really wanted to help with the decorating. This place was nice, and Charlie trusted me to do things here... it just sucked that Valentino still owned me and was the deciding factor.
"You... worked an extra shift?" I could hear the concern in Charlie's voice. "Is that... what you wanted to do?" There was suspicion in her voice. I felt myself tense up
"I thought we went over this babe. I like my work. I like being able to indulge. Ya seemed fine with my line of profession last time we spoke" I crossed all of my arms over my body looking down at her "what was it ya said? 'your body is your own, and sex work is real work.' Ya said ya weren't gonna ask me ta' quit. That sex was a part of life, and therefore couldn't be something I was sent here for. Did ya change ya mind or some shit?"
"Of course not! What you choose to do for work is none of my concern. But..." her voice faltered as her face turned softer "angel, is that a black eye?" She reached up to touch my face, and I flinched back, Vals laugh filling my head. I turned facing away from her
"'Course not" I muttered "must be th' lighting from down there. I'm fine." I heard her sigh of defeat
"Angel, I'm not telling you to quit your job... I just... well from what I've heard about your boss... he's not the nicest man around and I just—"
"Don't talk about things you don't know" I cut her off my voice harsh. "Valentino has protected me when no one else would. Every year when the angels come down he hides me away, keeps me safe. When clients take things too far he takes care of them and gives me what I need to get better. When I was lost and lonely and didn't know what to do, Val found me and gave me a job, a purpose! He gave me everything I couldn't find on earth... he never asked for anything I wasn't able to give. He never asked for anything other than me..." my words hung in the air for a few minutes. It was so quiet I could hear the clock on the wall ticking.
"And yet despite all of that" her voice was soft and gentle "you're here. You're trying to get better." I clenched my fists and my jaw unsure what to say to her. She was right. I was here. I did want something better, something more. But what? Val had given me everything... "the choice is yours, Angel. But if you ever need to talk, I'm here" I kept my eyes on the floor as I heard her walking away.
I wiped at my face, scrubbing the tears off of my fur "fuckin', I'm crying again... it must be this place..." I went to the stairs walking up to my room, closing the door a little harsher than I usually did. I grabbed my headphones turning on some music to unwind for the night.
I sat at my vanity, taking off my makeup before slowly pulling off my clothes. I winced badly, seeing the purplish bruises on my body. I deserved this. I ruined the take. I wasted his money. Every few minutes I had to wipe my tears away again.
"It's my fault. I did this to myself" I said quietly, though it was pretty muffled since I had my headphones on. I tugged on a hoodie and a pair of shorts before laying on my bed staring at the ceiling my music still playing. I felt Nugs cuddle into my side, giving him a gentle pat on his little head as I started to fall asleep. Maybe it was a dream. But I swear I heard a little staticky voice from my headphones say
"No one deserves this. You're not to blame"
YOU ARE READING
Learning to Love
FanfictionAngelDust doesn't think that anyone could possibly love him. He's been here in hell for years and not a single sinner has cared for him more than a single night. Why should this hotel be any different? Alastor has gone years without even considerin...
