HIT THE ROAD: UNCENSORED.

Chapter 4.

.Seungcheol made sure they were okay to all go on stage, he babied them and watched them complain in a way that let him know they would be fine. They continuously made jokes about how better the performance was going to be without him, he knew they were stressed but for their sake he pretended he was convinced.

Minghao stepped in front of him. "They might be okay with this but I'm not. I cannot go out there and work twice as hard and get nothing in return so the more time you spend away your bill increases so make your way back soon." He wanted to say more but he had run out of time so they laughed shared a quick hug and parted ways.

Jeonghan stood behind watching him with a longing look seeming like he was waiting for something but Scoups couldn't bring himself to meet his eyes. He had enough for now.

"Scoups" he whispered but the older man just walked away.
He busied himself talking to his managers and crew to make sure his members were going to be well taken care of. Then he took a breath of relief, for the first time in a long time, then took his bag and went out to the bus. He sat waiting for them to move but they had informed him that Jeonghan was coming along said boy joined them after a few moments of waiting.

Immediately the doors were shut he took his hand "I could take a lot from you Cheolie in fact I'll take anything now but please just talk to me."

"If you left the members to fend for themselves simply because you're looking for attention or you feel guilty I will never forgive you."

Jeonghan didn't waste time to release the water works that made Seungcheol sigh because he could never get used to it. "It's more than that, don't disregard my feelings like it is nothing."

"Okay," he pulled his hand out of his grasp. "I hope you get through whatever your problem is." He turned away but Jeoghan wasn't having it, he pulled his hand back and held it in a firm grasp.

"Please just stop, please I'm sorry."

"Leave me alone." His tone was calm so as to keep his anger in check.

"No, I want you to talk to me, tell me what you're feeling, tell me your thoughts, yell at me but please just. . ."

"No," he tried to pull out of Jeonghan's hold but the boy just held on tighter.

"Take a second to understand."
He almost lost his temper but took in a deep breath "You want me to understand and I need you to understand that I can't stand to look at you right now, I can't talk to you and not want to kill you, I want you to understand that you need to leave me alone. Why won't you leave me the fuck alone? " He was yelling now despite his efforts to remain calm.

His tone didn't faze Jeonghan evident when he yelled back immediately "Because I don't want you to leave me. Hell if I'm going to let one stupid drunken mistake get in the way of the best thing that I've ever had. I love you, Choi Seungcheol, you're everything that I've dreamed about and more, I spent too much time fighting my feelings for you and I don't want something that I couldn't even remember happening waste even more of my time. I swear to God I would take it back in a heartbeat if I could but I can't so I'm going to own up to this and take whatever it is you're going to throw at me if it means you'll stay, if it means that no matter how long it takes you you'll come back to me. You'll leave here knowing that you mean the world to me and I would wait for you for a thousand years."

Seungcheol let Jeoghan words sink in and heal the parts of him that held doubt all through their relationship, the parts that he thought would never heal but he couldn't bring himself to forgive him, each time he tried to look past it he got unwanted images of him beneath a complete stranger, kissing someone else, touching someone else in the way that he did with him letting himself be touched and enjoying it to the point where . . . looking someone else in the eyes the same way he did with him. Sharing something so intimate with someone he didn't know.

He pulled his hand out of Jeonghan's grasp, this time easily "Leave me alone." He turned to look out the window and enjoy the view but Jeonghans sobs wouldn't let him concentrate. He was adamant in his resolve thinking no matter what he could only cry for so long but he soon realised how wrong he was cause it only seemed to get worse when he realised it wasn't forced was when he watched Jeonghan struggle continuously to keep his tears at bay and they just kept pouring out.

He wanted to ignore him still but when it came to Jeonghan his heart was nothing more than a marshmallow so he took the boy into his arms petting him as he mumbled incoherently that he didn't want to lose him. He held onto him not letting out any false reassurances but he soon realised that as he held the boy he started to feel the parts of him that were broken heal, like his heart was sealing its cracks all on its own with the simple knowledge that Jeonghan loved him as much as he did.

He watched as his breaths rippled the smooth brown curls on his lovers head then when he was calm enough he began to speak "I'm going to be staying with my parents for the rest of the tour, I will try my best to visit occasionally but I'm not promising anything I would also start seeing a therapist because I'm not ready to leave you guys to fend for yourselves just yet." He took a deep breath "Hannie, you mean the world to me and I'm not ready to lose you too that's why I need to be away from you to really realise this and find it in my heart to forgive you so we can move on and start afresh. You have to be patient if you want this work cause I'm not going anywhere until were old and married and on our death beds. I am going to be here by your side forever. Jeongcheol will be forever."

The words were out there they held each other tighter because more than anything it was something that they both dreamed of, so they held each other cause they were going to be separated knowing that it would take time but they would meet again.

Seungcheol pressed a kiss on Jeonghans forehead as they sat preparing to part ways at the airport, he stepped down and as watched Scoups' retreating back he knew that no matter what they would be okay they had faced harder times and had come out stronger and this time will be no different. As Scoups had said Jeongcheol was forever.

With those thoughts in mind he let a smile easily stretched his lips, his fears were no more, the pain was nothing more than a distant memory and with that he knew it would not be long until he could return to the stage where he belonged with the familiar blinding lights and the deafening cheers from their distant loved ones.

The End.