(Sequel to 'The Flaws In Us')
After 5 years studying in New York and 3 Years not coming back home, Kai is back to go back for Christmas and also to attend his high school reunion. Although he didn't want to go, he has one reason that made him go bac...
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Stan
There's not a single calamity that came from being with Kai. He had not just opened up wrapping around me that covered up all of my flaws, but he opens up a sleeve around my heart that I hadn't known I could be this most felicitous in my life. Although I have opened up a barrier to him which not just let me fill him up in every way I could - to make an inconsiderate amount of love to him to which I have greatly known that he accepted with all of his heart, there was a feeling that I had trouble to make amends with: it was the guilt I felt towards him.
I haven't told him about why I ignore him, why I leave him there with any no reasons, why I became so different to him that he came to a thought that he didn't even know me at all. It was my fault that he stop being the lively teenage boy that he used to be. He was living his ever so true teenage dream that was mine as well and in just seconds, the dream he was living in was replaced with a nightmare so dreadful that he can't decide whether he has to hate me or not - to tell me to go fuck myself in the worst way possible that I had nothing left but to go back and say that 'I'm sorry' over and over again.
You would think it would be my punishment for being such a blockhead for making him go through that. I wasn't kind enough to be a blockhead... I was more than a blockhead when I break his heart - a fool, a stupid selfish motherfucker... an ignorant bastard. Yes, there was no reason for me to do that but how was I to choose. Choosing because I would end up being kicked out if I were to continue being in love with him. Call it what you want, but I was only seventeen, and I haven't had any enough money to even support myself if I was being neglected.
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I sat in front of my parents on a Friday where I was supposed to go out on a date with Kai. He was dragging all through the week about how he felt something was about to go wrong. At any minute, he would glance at everywhere and would not even eat his food properly.
The way he was so uneasy about something that he didn't know when to come is painful for me to see. It came to a point where I had to feed him his food - accompanying him in whatever that he does so that he doesn't make something foolish out of himself.
Today, I was going to bring him out after a hectic week and reminding him that I am always here to comfort him. He doesn't have to go through it all alone. I know how hard it will be when we come out to the world about our relationship but listening to his words in front of the waves before give me the strength to be strong for him too.
He was strong enough to be my boyfriend - to be with someone as layered as me when it came to being open. Therefore, I wanna come out to my family right now before our date and tell him that if him being with me made me courageous to come out, then me being with him should have the same effect as well. I just need to convince him that I'll stay with him by his side when he does so and will always be there to support him if he felt like shit.
