Breaking x Making Promises

One-On-One

a/n: *clears throat awkwardly* I... forgot I didn't post this...

16:38 GON: Paging Dr Retz paging Dr Retz

16:38 GON: What's the emergency

16:40 RETZ: Patient flatlining

16:40 RETZ: CLEAR

16:50 RETZ: Stabilized. Prescribed bedrest for the rest of the semester. Car privileges revoked.

16:50 GON: Understood

16:50 GON: Do you need a stay at home nurse

16:51 RETZ: lol no I'm studying for my midterm

16:51 RETZ: You'll just be a distraction :D

16:51 GON: Tru 💁🏽😛

When Killua opened the front door for Gon for the first time that semester, Gon was out of breath, red in the face, and holding his phone. Gon bent over his knees, panting, and gasped, "Retz... is fine... house arrest for the weekends until the end of the semester."

"The fuck? She's an adult," Killua said.

There was a moment's pause in which the two of them stared at one another from across the threshold. Killua swallowed hard. He was really doing this. He was really letting Gon back in after more than a month of pure heartache. After they had both shut down an eight month commitment.

Killua glanced behind him, where the apartment door was lightly shut. He could see a sliver of the living room through the crack in the door where Zushi was likely listening. He ducked his head as he turned back to the front door and stepped through. He propped it open with a wooden wedge as Gon stepped back and followed his lead out onto the front stoop.

It was chilly out, so Killua covered his palms with the ends of his sweatshirt before ducking down onto the top step. Gon watched, still on his feet, eyes just as owlish as ever. Killua felt hot under his attention. It'd been a month since Gon looked at him like that—since Gon really looked at him—and Killua could feel his vulnerability like a blanket against his trembling skin.

He crossed his arms over his stomach and said, "Do you... mind if we talk about boundaries?"

Gon crouched down, a step below Killua, so Killua didn't have to raise his eyes far to meet Gon's attentive gaze. "Sure. What is it?"

Killua bit his lip and looked away. After a deep breath, he confessed, "I don't think I can take it fast anymore."

Their relationship before had been... a whirlwind , to put it lightly. Killua had his own dorm room then, and really, the only thing slowing them down had been Gon's dedication to football. If there was a light practice, a break, a weekend without any prior commitments, they were screwing around up and down campus. And though Retz had reassured him that Gon's affections weren't as surface-level as Killua initially thought—however in a haze of anger—he couldn't ignore the acidic anxiety in his chest that came with any visual of the two of them like that again. He didn't want his relationship with Gon to be sexual without strings attached. He wanted to be tied up in Gon's threads of affection the way Retz was.

He was jealous of the gentle, nauseatingly sweet way Gon treated her.

"Okay, we'll go slow," Gon said with a firm nod.

Killua nodded. He looked down at his knees and let out the breath he had been holding. Gon's hand clasped onto his leg, and soon, Gon was hugging his knee with his cheek pressed to it, searching Killua's eyes as he said, "What's wrong? You can tell me."