The Sclemanteryx

Alarm

I became aware of a presence in the room. It emanated from the papyrus sketch that hung above our fireplace. A cheap holiday souvenir, nothing more. The sketched figures seemed to grow and take on a clearer form. Then came the mechanical demonic barking of Anubis, the half man, half dog deity. More terrifying still, was the emergence of a chattering corpse hunched over an ancient pulpit. He leaned into the room and raised a grotesque skeletal head, revealing venomous sapphire eyes. He thrust forwards a desiccated arm and pointed a blackened finger at my mother. His thin puckered lips parted as his chilling voice hissed the same phrase over and over again.

Harm

The flesh dripped from his bones and trickled along the deck, like candle wax. His tongue flapped in his mouth like a stranded fish as he uttered his final word. Sclemanteryx.

Charm

So we ended up watching the seagull eating a sandwich. Now I was convinced that it was egg and cress and the accordionist thought it was ham and mustard, but the dog thought it was bacon. I knew that because he thinks pretty much everything is bacon.
We asked the old lady who threw the sandwich and she said no, it was beef and horseradish, but the horseradish was a bit piquant, so he'll be after someone's drink now.