Diary Of A Girl

Febuary 1st

Yes I know I know it's been a

FREAKING MONTH

But I'll explain

So after New Years I was like on my laptop the whole day and couldn't be stuffed to update that happened everyday for about 2weeks. But that happiness ended.
until I needed to go to the beach

Yes

Needed

So anyway, it was this family friend reunion thing and I couldn't be stuffed to go so I was like "what eves" and then said,

"But wait, let me take my laptop"

and my mums like

"Uh uh young lady, you are gonna have some fun."

And I was like dying inside because once upon a time and barbie life in the dream house with skittles on my lap is my type of fun.

So then defeated, I said ok. and then snuck my phone in my swimming bag. Fully charged.

Yes

Swimming bag

Trust me that was a really weird place to put but it worked! And I was like yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaas you are gonna be defeated mum!

And then the big day arrived.

Everyone was like

"THE BEACH!"

And I was like

Hehehe no one will know...

And all these beach chairs are here and we see our family friends and I whip out ma phone.

I played:

Fruit ninja
Angry birds
Temple run
And I texted my friends.

But then there were little tiny feet- hitting- the -ground-noises-while-running and I knew who it was.

Here comes the terror

It was

One of the little five year old boys running towards me and this meant

A hug

You might be thinking

Aaaaaw that's sooooo cute

but what I'm thinking is.

Ew.

He's been playing in the water and there is water all over him and he's

Wait for it

Holding crabs

More specifically

Live ones

So I was like

"Okay, are these like your pets or sonething"

And he was like

"Nooooo I just found them under these rocks"

And I was thinking poor crabs they were probably watching crab netflix with crab Ryan gosling and crab skittles on their lap

Until they got picked up by a five year old boy with chocolate covering the outside of his face.

Like me with the beach story the day before where my mum was forcing me to go.

Anyway

So I was like

"Cool did you give them names"

And he's like

"No. But I'm going to squish them wanna see?"

And I'm like sitting there gawking at him

Did anyone teach this boy about animal cruelty?

And then I was like

"No thanks, but thanks anyways"

And he's like

"No prob, I'll just hang with the other boys."

And then I'm like thank Jesus and god

Then I pick a sausage and a cupcake to be on my plate that's on my lap.

And the sausage and the cupcake was really good.

So then I take another then another, until I'm pretty sure I've got a food baby.

Then I go back to my phone.

Then my mum comes up to me and is like,

"you having a good time on your phone?"

And I'm like yes thank you and she just shrugs her shoulders and lets me go.

But now

She knows I took my phone

Damn it

Should've keep it a little bit more on the Down low like drugs.

Okay now that's inappropriate don't learn from me children.

Anway that was eventful tomorrow I've got school ugh.

Wish me luck

Rant of the day:

Why can't god bless us girls with no hair on our body, and flawless skin?

Now I'm falling into a vortex of barbie life in the dream house and once upon a time

Larry xxx