Love me 'till I'm me again - (Scott and Mitch Fanfiction)

Chapter 13 - Begin again

So, this is the pre-epilogue, I think. It's a chapter about Mitch and how he deals with everything after the last events. I hope it doesn't disappoint you ( don't hate me too much!) and I really, really hope you like it and comment on it! I hope this story is still relevant. 

Read, rate, comment! ly . xo

There isn't much that can make Mitch smile these days.He walks through the crowded streets in a constant state of nothingness, enveloped in something of a peaceful numbness. Not quite a piercing sadness, but not his usual energetic self either. He used to light up a room when he walked in it, flail his arms and smile brightly and suddenly he had the heart of every person there, their attention at least, if not admiration. Now he was living more out of habit, instead of intent.

Mitch sighed as he wrapped his scarf tighter around his neck, thinking how the cold was suiting for his overall state. Numb inside and out, like a walking popsicle. Just great.

He was almost at Kirstie's apartment, and he was doing great, really, going on 3 days of not picking up his phone, writing a text and then erasing it, and also of not thinking too much of Scott, well, not too deeply anyway; erasing him completely would be impossible and required temporary amnesia. (Mitch was ready for a giant block of ice to fall on his head anytime now.He was willing to dive head first into the frozen lake in central park, actually.)
However, his thoughts wandered, naturally,as they do.

They hadn't talked in 3 weeks. He knew it would be another 3 weeks until the wedding. They weren't friends anymore, not in their daily lives anyway- somehow, Mitch knew the blonde would be etched onto his heart forever, like a rusting part that's essential for it to work properly. He would have done anything for him, sacrifice any of the little he had. But he couldn't be friends with him.

The blame was on himself,of course. He was the one who went on and had let himself fall for someone so essential in his life; he should've told Scott about his feelings the second he registered they were there, and go on from his response. Before the stolen glances and the lingering touches turned into him feeling breathless one day, realizing how screwed he was. Before Jo came waltzing in their life, naturally, like her place had been there all this time,waiting for her. Certainly before that kiss, the one that never should've happened. What must've been simply acting on a whim for Scott had been a world turning on its axis for Mitch, a light that made him and everything around golden while it lasted.It had been a trap, a beautiful, awe inspiring trap. Knowing how Scott s lips felt against his,knowing the rhythm they would move in if Mitch was to close the distance between them.. That ruined Mitch for good, and now they couldn't be friends.

He knocked on Kirstie's door and waited. He wasn't going to cry, not now. He knew that every time he cried he was just mourning his friendship with Scott.
Just then Kirstie opened the door, and gestured Mitch in. "Hi love , how you've been?'
Mitch just shrugged and threw and apathetic 'fine'.
Kirstie didn't buy it for a second ' I mean how you've been really feeling.'
'Well, my best friend whom I'm in love with is getting married in 3 weeks.Other than that, can't complain. '
He laughed quietly and walked in under Kirstie's concerned look. After all,he had to start from somewhere. Rock bottom sounded just fine.
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3 days later, Kirstie manages to convince him getting over someone requires finding someone new, and so they go out. Mitch puts on his tightest pair of black jeans and fakes a smile. Surprisingly, lots of boys try and flirt with him, and by the time he finishes his third martini (not one of them bought by himself!) he's almost, almost having a nice time.It doesn't mean the pain isn't curling around his chest anymore, like a tangible wound ,but this time it's more like a smoke floating in lazy circles instead of cold, unforgiving shackles.