Love me 'till I'm me again - (Scott and Mitch Fanfiction)

Chapter 7 - Big,hollow eyes.

I'm so sorry this took so long ; I finally have a plan for this story and it's a lot of drama.I'm sorry this isn't as poetic as Sleepless Storm,but I try to keep the same style of writing without posting the same story,you know? In this the characters are more flawed and more human.And yes,it's a slow burn,because I never let them have their cake right away ;) This chapter is kind of a filler in order to get to the next one,so sorry.

So anyway,thanks for all the comments and votes,please continue.I really really want to hear what you think about this new one,so yeah,comment? Suggestions? Enjoy,love you.

It was late at night when Mitch wasted his sleep once again by counting all the reasons this was wrong,which he did more often than he should.

During all this he realized that he would sometimes catch himself watching Scott talk without listening,just staring at him with a vague smile on his lips,nodding from time to time to reassure him he was paying attention (which obviously,he didn't).

And that was just because he was too busy noticing the way his eyes widened when he was asking a question or the way his smiles started in a slight smirk and was a bit crooked, the way goosebumps erupted on his skin whenever the blonde would place his hand on his arm while talking or the way his voice was harsh in the morning but had depth late at night.

And that's why he knew letting go of his feelings would be the hardest thing he'd ever have to do.Two days had passed since the party,and all he achieved during the lack of sleep was this -he had to let go.It was going to hurt,but feelings like that were meant to be complicated,they were meant to be ripped out of your own chest,not gently blown away.

Lying in his bed,he groaned loudly when he heard his phone go off.It was the middle of the night,for Christ's sake.He rolled on his side and grabbed his phone.He immediately regretted that decision and had the urge to throw it across the room and smash it to pieces.

From : Scott

My biggest fear is losing you.Please don't ever make me face that fear.You have absolutely no idea how much you mean to me.

'You blimmering idiot' Mitch murmured and sniffled,locking his phone.'I fucking love you,you twat.' He added and closed his eyes,groaning once again.He hated mixed signals,and he hated being messed with.He hated double-meaning conversations and walking around in the dark,trying to understand what people wanted from him.But he loved him,and that was all his fault.

He remembered what Kirstie once told him.'Take pride in the fact that even though the rest of the world may disagree,you still believe it to be a beautiful place.' and all he could think was 'Well of course they would disagree,they haven't met Scott yet.'

And that's when he realized just how bad and confusing things ought to become,and how there was no saving himself off the sinking ship at that point.

He'd have to go overboard.

To : Scott

Stop it.You know bloody well what you're doing.Stop trying to guilt me into this.

Mitch threw his phone on the nightstand ,hiding under the covers.The night dragged itself endlessly,lacking it's usual serenity.It was silent,but it wasn't calm;Mitch's heart was pounding so rapidly,like it wanted out.Covering his chest with his tiny livid hands,he tried his best to calm his breathing and talk some sense into himself.

'Breathe.Don't forget he sent you away.You stopped loving him.You're in love with a product of your imagination.You stopped,now breathe and move on.Stop missing him so much'

________________

Two weeks had passed.It had been 5 days since the last text Scott sent him,and 3 days since Kirstie last mentioned it.2 days since he stopped bursting into fits of spontaneous crying,and 1 day since he last played that night in his head,stumbling over each word.

Mitch didn't know how to deal with the intensity of his feelings,he didn't like being vulnerable to anyone or being manipulated.So the only thing he could come up was just ignoring the problem until it would eventually go away.

Naturally,it didn't.Because it was 1 am and his heartbeat skyrocketed yet again when a little notification came up on his phone,saying it was Scott.He fumbled with his hands for a few minutes,trying to ignore they were shaking and he'd lost all colour in his cheeks.He was debating whether actually checking the text would be a good idea.It would certainly not help with his sanity,that was for sure.

He checked it,of course.And he knew instantly it wasn't one of his regular text,saying I miss you or How you've been? it was rushed and troubled and Mitch just knew something was wrong;the weaker part of him won and for the first time in weeks he replied to Scott's text.Typing a brief 'Come over' he threw a pillow over his head because Oh my god,what was he doing.

And it wasn't long until his doorbell rang and he got up,groaning,prepping his heart for the shock he'll probably experience seeing his best friend in two weeks.He opened the door and the two of them froze for a few minutes,just sitting in the tranquil silence.

Mitch quickly took in the state the blonde was in : glimmering eyes,red from crying.Empty look,livid face,messed up hair.He wanted so bad to reach over and brush it softly with his fingers - he couldn't,of course.So instead,he bit his lower lip and asked in a cautious,low voice:

'What's wrong,what happened?' Strange eyes met and all the air in Mitch's lungs rushed out.Scott returned his glance just for a split second,quickly fixating a point on the floor and staring at it,like he was afraid to even look Mitch in the eye.

'She,uh,' His voice started as a whispered mumble,but continued in a flat tone that gave off exactly no feeling  'She cheated on me.'

Mitch was quite sure you could hear his heart plummet into his stomach.A thousand thoughts came rushing over him;'What happened,why would she do that to someone as incredible as Scott,how much did he actually love her if he is this broken about it,how could she,why was he here,why do I feel like throwing up,can he be mine now,probably not' and so on.

An incredibly warm wave washed over him and suddenly the world seemed so small and insignificant as oppose to how big and hollow Scott's eyes were.There was all this electricity in their skin and he felt his heart hum a song that sounded a lot like 'You belong to him,now go make it right' so when Mitch reached to cup Scott's cheek his fingers just seemed to fit so well .Mitch caught himself whispering 'It's alright,love,it's alright.It's gonna be ok.' 

Their hands tangled and Scott didn't object when Mitch pulled him in and closed the door behind them,knowing all too well that this boy owned him,with all his hushed words and toxic secrets,but especially with his blue,clear eyes.