𝕊𝕒𝕝𝕝𝕪~ 𝕎𝕚𝕝𝕓𝕦𝕣 𝕤𝕠𝕠𝕥 𝕒𝕟𝕘𝕤𝕥

𝔼𝕚𝕘𝕙𝕥

The door flung open.

My body bashed onto the cold wood floor as a woman stood above me. She woke me up.. I was at peace..

She kneeled down to me, my eyes slowly looking up at her. I began to get up but she used her hand to forceful push me back down onto the brown floor.

"Learned your lesson yet?" She ticked her head to the side.

"Y–yes.. please don't put me back in there I'm sorry" I begged, my voice rasped the back of my throat. I desperately needed water.

Her eyes disapproved of me.

She grabbed a fist full of my hair and yanked me up, forcing my body to sit up. It hurt. But what else was expected?

"What did we learn?" Her voice rang through the dark hallway, she pulled my head back so I was forced to look at her in her eyes.

"I– um.. I need to listen to you, you- you are alsways right.." I mumbled, I almost said it as a question. Stumbling over my words, tears pricked my eyes. I'm so hungry, I want to eat. So so badly but I'm not allowed too.

"Good" she let go of my head and got up. Again she stood over me and looked down on me, this was her way of telling me she's better than me I guess. "Clean up that mess you made in there"

With those words she walked away, to where is the acual question. I never actually knew what she did when she's not tormenting me.

I looked down to my legs, I had no emotions going through me. I have no idea how to even feel. I should get to cleaning that bloody mess.. sighing I get up slowly as I feel my head spin slightly.

Thats when I noticed my hands, they are stained red and so is my shirt.

Small punchers could be seen in my hands. Glancing back to the small room my heart starts to quicken, I start to feel sweaty looking at the blood on the floor.

My blood.

I force my eyes to look over at the mirror with dry blood on the sides. But I can't keep on looking at that room, it hurts to look at and it hurts to be in there. Still, I have to move on and clean up the mess I made.

I start my path to the kitchen, the hallway dark and slightly narrow. I don't like it, but then again I don't like many things in this house. The creaky floorboards, the old doors, the bathroom sink. It was all out a horror movie. And I despised it.

I slowly walked into the kitchen to grab some paper towels, soap, and bleach. I debated getting a bucket of water but instead I just got a coffee cup filled with water. Most of the blood was dry, the drying blood was new. Maybe from a few minutes before I woke up.

Making my way back to that small closet room, everything started to feel so surreal. I don't want to be back here. Even though I'm not getting any sort of punishment, I want to be far way from that thing.

But I knew damn well that not cleaning up would resort to worse things.

So I scrubbed, and scrubbed, and scrubbed.

Even though half my body was in the room, even though the door was open, even though I could get up and walk away. It felt otherwise. It felt like if I  slipped up I'd have to go back in there.

Tears pricked my eyes as my hands started to shake, I let out a long uneven breath.

I sit up and close my eyes, not again.

. – – it hurts to be alive..

I don't want to keep doing this anymore.. I just want my mind to be a rest. I can't take the fucking pain of being alive anymore, I can't keep doing this any longer or ill go insane.