One In The Same

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My alarm woke me up. The music blaring from the speakers. I groaned and turned it off quickly.

I hadn't slept well last night. Only about three to four hours. My eyes struggled to stay open. And then I remembered.

It was Joey's first day of school. Her first day of high school at River Cross. It wasn't a big school. It had two floors and a basement. And then everything else a school should have. Lockers. Tables. Desks. Teachers. Students. A typical high school. But, now it had a new student. And I had yet to see her.

I sat up and rolled out of bed. My feet were met with the cold hardwood ground of my bedroom. I shivered as I got up, throwing the covers from my body. I sat up and stretched, my arms lifting above my head with a groan. Finally getting to my feet, I made my way to my dresser.

Rummaging through the various items of clothing inside, I pulled out an old gray sweater with black stripes. I opened up the drawer underneath and pulled out a pair of faded black jeans. And then, I made my way towards the bathroom to get ready.

I showered quickly. Running the towel over my body, I pulled on my boxers. I couldn't look at myself in the mirror. I knew what I would see. A blonde boy with blue eyes who was as twisted as you could get. And I didn't need the reminder. I already beat myself up as it is.

I dressed myself quickly, towel drying my blonde air. I plugged in the blow dryer. (Yes. I blow dry my hair. Get over it.) When it was finally dry, I styled it into its normal quiff. I ran my fingers through the strands. I dragged my toothbrush across my teeth, trying to avoid my reflection.

I sighed and then made my way to the kitchen. I grabbed whatever food I could scrounge up from my fridge, not having a whole lot of choices. Stuffing an apple, half of a PB&J, and a bottle of water, into a plastic bag.

Grabbing my bag from its place on the ground, I slipped on my old black chucks. I glanced at the clock and internally groaned. It was time for me to go to school.

Since I didn't own a car, I was forced to walk the couple blocks to school. The air was cold against my skin, sending chills down my spine. The sun was shining against my face. The ground was rough against my feet. I tucked my hands into my pockets.

As I made my way to school, I couldn't help but think about, Joey. I wondered what she was doing now. I wondered if she was getting ready or if she was already on her way. Her beautiful face filled my mind in an instant, making my heart flutter.

I reveled in the feeling she gave me. The rush I always felt when I thought about her. The thrill I get when I picture her as my next prize. The game that I have planned, making my fingers twitch in anticipation. It was something that I couldn't and can't control. And I felt as though I was ready.

I rounded the last corner and stopped. Standing a few feet away from me was a brick building. It had dirt that formed the perimeters. The building was looming ahead of me and I really did not want to make my feet move forward. Nobody honestly likes school. Its torture.

If it was up to me, I would stay home. Or go out. But, I couldn’t risk the possibility of getting caught. It wasn’t worth it.

The halls were quiet as I stepped inside and past the threshold, my feet scuffling along the white tile. Nobody had arrived yet. Well none of the kids anyway. Teachers walked past me, not even bothering to shoot me a second glance. They conversed quietly with the others or rushed past carrying bags and papers. Several of them stopped to stoop things back into their overflowing hands.

As I walked, I searched for her face, even though it was highly unlikely she would be here this early. My feet carried me forward, moving of their own accord. And then I ventured down a hall.

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