Sexual Exploration 2

63

welcome to the shittiest chapter I've ever written

but remember the surprise coming after this book ends!

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Seeing Agust hang out with everyone in such a casual atmosphere, laughing and talking with everyone without any stiffness or awkwardness only made Namjoon feel worse and worse.

The alter was getting along and learning, something Namjoon never thought he could do.

Finally, the guilt became too much, and he knew he had to come clean, no matter the consequences.

"Trust...is a two way street. And I've...been lying to you."

But first, he wanted to tell Yoongi the truth. Not even his husband knew the secret Namjoon had been keeping, and Namjoon wanted his support first before he told everyone else.

He found Yoongi in his study, working on future lesson plans.

"Yoongi..." Namjoon closed the door behind him.

Yoongi frowned, looking up at his husband with concern.

Namjoon almost never called him Yoongi, and the slight shakiness in the boys voice was evidence enough that something was wrong.

"What's wrong?" Yoongi stood up instantly. "What's wrong, baby?"

Namjoon bit his lip, feeling small as Yoongi held him, even though he was the tallest in the house.

Yoongi was patient, letting Namjoon get his thoughts together first, holding him tightly.

Finally, Namjoon pulled back, unable to look his husband in the eyes as he confessed.

Yoongi was silent in shock for a few long moments, and when Namjoon dared to peek up at him, the look in his husbands eyes was something cold, something Namjoon had never seen before and his heart jumped, realizing just how much he had fucked up.

"I'm so sorry," he whispered.

Yoongi was silent.

-

Later that day, everyone was sitting in the living room, with Namjoon standing in front of him, his heart about to pound out of his chest.

Agust was in the middle, Jimin curled against him and Taehyung on his other side.

"What did you want to tell us?" Jungkook asked.

"Yeah, and why do you look like you're about to die?" Hoseok asked.

Namjoon forced himself to look at all of them, his gaze ending on Agust's, whose eyes blinked innocence.

The student sighed. "I just told Yoongi this a little bit ago, so please don't think he knew about this, I kept it a secret from everyone."

"Take your time," Seokjin encouraged.

Namjoon took a deep breath. "I want to start by saying I'm seriously so sorry, and that doesn't mean shit now since I can't change anything, but in the beginning, it made sense, so I did it, okay?"

Jungkook looked confused. "Did...what?"

Namjoon sighed. "I...lied."

"Oh I do that all the time." Hoseok laughed. "No worries."

"About what?" Taehyung asked.

Namjoon stared at Agust, who looked so happy and relaxed with everyone surrounding him. The same people he wanted to hurt last year.

Namjoon had always been told that people don't change, but Agust was an alter, and he had definitely changed.

"I lied...about..." He couldn't force himself to sugarcoat it. He had to just come out and say the harsh truth.

"RM was never real."