Sticks & Stones || l.h.

Chapter 3

//
Warning:
Just letting you know, this chapter talks about self harm. It doesn't go into detail but I do mention it. Some might find it triggering so if you do maybe skip it..? Well just letting you know that you can come to me if you are having any troubles and I will do my best and try to help you. I love you guys!! Okay, to chapter!!
~Carissa
//

Primary school was fine. Matt, Luke and I all helped each other get through any problems any of us would have. Over the years, we got even closer.

Everything was perfect until year seven. Matt had to move to another city. His parents got divorced and he went to go live with his dad. Then Julia slowly drifted away to hang out with the 'popular' crowd. Leaving just Luke and I in our group.

We were okay with that though. Neither of us were really social and didn't like the idea of getting to know people very often. We just liked the people we knew we could trust, the ones that have been around us our whole lives.

Year eight rolled around and everything got even worse for me. I was getting bullied. Everyday. Every week. And to make that even worse, the popular girls were doing it. The popular girls including Julia.

It really hurt that she was doing that. Whenever I looked at her when she was doing it, I could tell it was hard for her. We were friends for years and I knew she just wanted to fit in.

The girls would always call me fat, and ugly, and useless, and they said that know did or ever will love me. And I believed them. Even though I had the best friend anyone could ever want and an amazing mom that always did her best to help me. I believed them. And it really got to me.

After months of it happening, I started cutting. I know, it was terrible. But it was the only way to get rid of the pain. Luke soon found out because he noticed all the bracelets I started wearing.

We were in my backyard when he saw them. And when he did, he started crying. It scared me so much. I have never seen him cry. He was always so strong and it really hurt to see him like this. I started crying as well. Then he started telling me things that have still to this day gotten me through all the hard things in my life.

He said, "Haley. Why are you doing this to yourself? You are so beautiful and I have no clue why you would do something like this. I get that life can get rough. And I know you are going to want to hurt yourself. But don't do it. Please. Can you tell me what made you do this to yourself?"

Tears were still streaming down both of our cheeks. Luke has grabbed ahold of my hands and I just looked down at them. I took a deep breath and looked into his sad, worried, but still hypnotizing blue eyes.

"For a couple months," I said with a shaky voice, "girls have been bullying me. Julia and her friends call me ugly and useless and say that no one will ever love me because I'm fat. I was just so tired of hearing them say things like that. I just wanted it to stop. Forever. Because I believed them. I believed all the nasty things they said about me and I hate myself for thinking that they were right, but after a while, you just can't help but to think it is true."

I was crying even harder now and I think Luke was too. "Don't you dare ever think that those things they said are true. You are not ugly. You are beautiful. You are the most beautiful person I have ever know. And you are not fat. Your body is perfect just the way it is. And don't think that nobody will ever love you because you know a lot of people do. Your mom, my mom, the rest of my family, and especially me. I will always love you. I will love you until the day I die and for an eternity after that."

After that, I pulled Luke into a tight hug. Hearing that he loved me, made me feel a million times better. He pulled away and lifted my arms up and kissed them where all the cuts were.

"Just remember, sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never harm me." He pulled me up off the ground and hugged me again.

"Thank you," I whispered to him. He just looked up at me and smiled. We both wiped our eyes and walked inside. The rest of the day we just laid on the couch watching movies and soon feel asleep, his arms around my waist.