SID (DISCONTINUED)

Chapter 5 (Lord Wrinkles)

Sid's right eye twitched.

"Did you just laugh at me, you sick fuck?"

Another chuckle made Sid gain a tick mark.

"Bakashi!! Shut the fuck up before you get slapped the fuck up, you pig!"

Kakashi stopped, but had the fucking audacity to go back to reading his motherfucking book again.

Sid stood up, slapping the book out of his hands.

"The fuck, dude!? I just got wounded and this is the shit I get!?"

"...You tried to attack me-"

"That don't matter!"

"...You slapped my Icha Icha-"

"That don't- wait, Icha Icha?"

"..."

"..."

"..."

"...You sick fuck."

"I read it for the plot."

"Yeah the fuck right, and I'm the First Hokage."

"I'm serious-"

"How often do you jerk off to that shit? Disgusting! And to think I was near you!"

"You still are-"

"So, you don't deny it?"

"What-no!! I mean-yes-I mean- I deny it!!"

"Keep spitting shit out your mouth, bud."

"I like the plot!"

"I'm sure you do. What's your favorite part, the threesomes, or oral sex?"

"Actually, the threesome part is pretty-wait, how do you know what those are!?"

"I'm cultured, fool."

"..."

"...And the fact that I've had a Jashin worshipper as my sensei."

"...You're a strange one."

"The only thing strange here is your book!"

"...How dare you."

"Because I'm a bad bitch, you can't kill me."

"...I'm going to stop talking to you now."

"What? And get back to your book? How do you even sleep at night, knowing you're ruining your image even more?"

"You don't even know what my image is."

"Sure I do. You're the Leaf's Secret Pedo."

"What?" Kakashi was offended very much so.

"You heard me."

"...I don't even-"

"Excuses, excuses."

"...I'm this close to choking you."

"You're into that kinky shit? Weirdo."

"No-I-" Kakashi stumbled upon his words, sighing.

"Wait-you know what's in that book, so you've read it."

"Wrong; my sensei did." Sid clicked her tongue.

"...And you read over his shoulder?" Kakashi rose a brow.

"No, but he read it aloud."

"...What kind of teacher does that-"

"Hey! You have no right to talk! You read that nasty ass book in front of children!" Sid then huffed, crossing her arms.

"He did the same!" Kakashi said exasperatedly.

"Lies! He read it in front of me!" Sid countered, holding a fist up, shaking it.

"Exactly!"

"I'm not a child!!"

"Ahem." Both parties of the argument turned towards the newcomer, who just so happened was standing in front of the Hokage door.

With the Third Hokage right behind him.

Kakashi sweatdropped, rubbing the back of his neck sheepishly.

"Ah...Lord Third!" He chuckled nervously. "I was just about to see you-"

"He means 'we', Lord Wrinkles."

If people could see Kakashi's facial expression, they would be able to make out a long, flat merp face.

"Hey, that's our Hokage! Who do you think you are, disrespecting him?!" The random shinobi standing in front of the Hokage said.

"You don't wanna say that-"

"Your mom."

At least Kakashi could say he tried.

He ran a hand down his face in embarrassment.

He sighed as the Hokage chuckled.

"Hello there, child."

"I ain't no child, son." Sid then spit on the floor like the disgusting badass she was.

Kakashi stood there, astounded, as did the random shinobi in front of him.

"I..." Kakashi didn't know what to say.

The Hokage cleared his throat. "So, Sid-"

"How in the fuck do you know my name?"

"Well-"

"Stalkin' me, are you?"

"No-"

"Shut up, I'm fabulous."

"You're really not."

"Shut up, Bakashi."

"You're more disgusting than anything."

"Says the public porn reader."

"It's not porn."

"Right, it's plot."

"Yes."

"I'm not buying it, bub."

"But it's the truth!"

"So you say."

"Ahem. As I was saying-"

"You're rude for interrupting my conversation with this revolting gentleman."

The Third blinked, before he continued.

"Kakashi told me."

Kakashi pursed his lips, wondering why the Third had to throw him to the wolves like that.

"SO IT WAS YOU!! YOU RATTED ME OUT!"

He sighed. He was gonna be here for a while...